(Closed) need opinions… am I being unreasonable? (long)

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
5904 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

i think you should let it go.  sure, it definitely sucks, but despite all your amazing help, she is probably just overwhelmed and not willing to commit to anything.  also, it sounds like you volunteered for the majority of these tasks- and while that is really awesome of you, i wouldn’t be counting that against her. 

Post # 4
Member
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Nope. I would be pissed.

Post # 5
Member
435 posts
Helper bee

I can understand being upset, but she is probably overwhelmed.  If she is normally a gracious person I’d just let it go. 

Post # 6
Member
636 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

Wow – I don’t know – I definitely understand why you are annoyed.  I get that you did volunteer for a lot of those tasks but I would have never asked my BMs to get DJ prices or pick up favors to save a few pennies.  I would think that even if you begged her to do these things for her she should be going out of her way to thank you and certainly not making you feel like the bad guy for wanting her to open your gift in front of you.  Hopefully it is just temporary wedding insanity and she will sanp out of it.  I don’t think you are out of line to be peeved at all though.

Post # 7
Member
423 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I’d be upset too!  I might bring it up to her when the wedding and everything is done and over with.  Not about how she “owed” you five min or anything, but just that you found it hurtful.  In the meantime, try to put it aside and focus on having a blast at her wedding!  I’m sure she will love your gift, whenever she gets it – i think that it is an amazingly thoughtful one 🙂

Post # 9
Member
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

You’ve certainly done a lot for her and I hope she appreciates it.  I am inclined to take her side that the day before the wedding is probably not the best time to do something like this.  She’ll have a lot on her plate that day!  I know you say it will only take five minutes, but in reality, by the time you get together, open the gift, and talk about it, it would probably be an hour or more.

Could you you just ask her when a good time would be that you could all get together to open the gift?  Will you see at her the day after the wedding?  I bet she will be way more relaxed then.

Post # 11
Member
5904 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2012

@Ambellina13 – i’m not excusing her actions- she was def rude…but sometimes it’s just worth letting it go.  when i was a bridesmaid, i was really excited for my friend and i remember asking her about some details and she full on snapped at me and told me to back off (completely over the top)…i was pretty miffed, but i just gave her space for a while as i figured she was probably stressed and fielding similar questions from 10,000 other people.  quite honestly, though, it was uncalled for. just didn’t want to make it a big issue, ya know?  you’ve every right to be P.O.ed though.  on another note, how do you all create the nifty little links when you direct a comment at someone such as @blablah….lol

Post # 12
Member
1391 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Maybe you can give them the present at the rehearsal dinner? I understand she may be busy but I would definitely be hurt too. I am sorry what tough situation 🙁

Post # 15
Member
177 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I WOULD BE PISSED AND I WOULD LET HER KNOW

Post # 16
Member
487 posts
Helper bee

I would try to be understanding but I would definately still be hurt.  She might have had a stressful moment.  Maybe a fight with someone, or something gone wrong and was just feeling short tempered.  I would give it another day and try to ask again.  If she feels the right to be that way with you, I think you have earned the right to be too.  If she says that again, I would simply say that you and your friends put alot of thought into this gift and are so excited to give it to them and while you understand that she is busy, there is no reason that they can’t find 5 minutes in their busy schedule to open your gift.  How can she say no to that?

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