Post # 1
We are planning on having a weekend wedding event at a national park lodge about an hour and a half away from SO’s hometown. We are hoping everyone comes in on Friday, we would be paying for everyone to tour the caves across from the hotel where we’re staying that night then have a mobile pizza place up for a dinner (at our expense) and a bonfire behind the hotel. Saturday would be the wedding day, it will be at dusk on a footbridge about a 10 minute drive from the hotel and then the reception back at the hotel where of course we would be paying for dinner and such. Everyone would stay another night and head out Sunday morning. So that leaves guests to purchase their own breakfasts and lunches from the hotel cafe (hotel is up a mountain away from the town so it’s really their only option) and be in charge of their own room expense (rooms range from $80-$160).
I don’t think thats an unreasonable amount for guests to be responsible for, is it???
I think the only thing that makes me feel like maybe people won’t come or will feel put out is because we are not leaving them any other options. There aren’t other food choices close by and wedding guests need to be staying at the hotel (with few exceptions), considering the location and how many we have room for.
Does that seem reasonable? Would you go to a wedding if that was the case?
Post # 3
If it’s important to them, they’ll come!
Its very generous of you to provide all of that for your guests! You may want to make a more extended invitiation highlighting all of the weekend activities. (With separate RSVPs for each, so they don’t feel obligated to attend all!) $80-$160 is very reasonable for the hotel.
Post # 4
That sounds fun but if I didn’t know about it and the hotel was only 1.5 hours, I would not spend the night on Friday. How will you let guests know that you are organizing all of theses things and covering the cost?
Post # 5
It sounds like you’re doing more than enough to make your guests happy but as @slicey19 said, if I was not in the wedding party then I would drive up on Saturday and more than likely just stay the night of the wedding.
Is there a reason why you’re asking your guests to come the day before other than the activities you have planned? Does the resort require a minimum 2 night stay? If your guests have to stay more than one night, I think some may have an issue with that (I know mine would).
Post # 6
I am planning on a wedding website to go overthe activities for the weekend and invitations will be more of a pouch with information. Also, guests wouldn’t have to stay both nights, they could just stay Saturday (I’m guessing some people will do this). Most of the guests are coming from my hometown (4 hours away) or the Seattle area (8 hous) so there wouldn’t be a lot of people who are only an hour and a half away. Since it’s a national park I worry about a lot of people saying they’ll just come for the day or they’ll camp close by (the hotel prefers that wedding guests be staying because of the location and the amount of room they have available).
Post # 7
I think you are going to be giving everyone a great time. I would totally come.
Wait… CAN I come???!
Post # 8
@stateline: I think you can host the event that you want to host, and then each individual can declde if that is ok with them and their budget.
Will there be some people who can’t/won’t make it, possibly. But that is up to them.
Personally, I would not come up on Friday. If your wedding was at 11am, then I may, but given that it is at dusk, I wouldn’t have to leave until 1pm to get there on time (if I was in the 4 hr group) and get ready. And not too early in the morning if I was the 8 hr group.
Post # 9
I think you are awefully generous. That’s not much to ask your guests at all, I’d come.
Post # 10
I’m not sure if I understand your post, but if I understood it right, guests will just be paying for their hotel for one or two nights? That sounds fine to me. We have a hotel block and the price is $80 per night. Sounds good to me 🙂
Post # 11
Sounds fantastic to me! If funds are really tight people always have the option of bringing food with them so as not to pay for the other meals – but that’s up to them to work out!
You’ve done an amazing about of organising, now you just have to invite those you want there and the ones who really matter will come.
Post # 12
I am planning a similar type of event. The wedding party will arrive in Baltimore, where the groomsman will pick up thier tuxedos and have dinner(they pay for dinner but we have paid for half the tux expence), We are picking up the hotel bill for that night. The next day they will drive out to the Eastern shore for lunch at our home. Out of towners who have arrived are also invited. After lunch we need help decorating at the club and the rehearsal will follow. Everyone is invited to the dinner because almost everyone is from out of town. After dinner there will be a bowling minnie golf party (we pay for dinner and party but if they want more food at the bowling ally they are on thier own).
Saturday I have arranged for a historic tour of the town or driving range time ( we pay) They are on there own for lunch and the ceremony is followed by dinner and dancing. The thing is all of our guests are from out of town so I felt like we had to do something. Does this seem reasonable?
Post # 13
@ronny: Seems very generous to me. I know how you feel! It’s really tough when everyone is a guest for the weekend and you want to make care of your guests plus you’re trying to budget. If we have to cut on the budget then we’ll first cut paying for the cave tours and then just pay for those involved in the wedding for the rehersal and let anyone else get dinner on their own back at the hotel… That’s if we have to cut corners so we’ll see…
Post # 14
If you were immediate family or a very close friend I would most likely come for the whole weekend and for the cost you mentioned it would not be an issue at all. Otherwise I would only come for Saturday.
Also distance makes a difference as well and whether -no offense- I want to make a weekend getaway of your wedding destination or not. Whether I’m driving or if I have to get airfare.
Our wedding was in NYC and within reasonable driving destination of all guests and a lot of people came in Friday night, Saturday wedding and drove home Sunday morning.
Post # 15
@stateline: ‘Since it’s a national park I worry about a lot of people saying they’ll just come for the day or they’ll camp close by’
I’d just be upfront about the costs and have rsvps for each event if you need to know how many are coming in friday.
But you can’t really make people stay at the hotel vs camp – I’m sure most people will choose a hotel but it’s still got to be up to them and what they choose whether to not stay over or camp or whatever.