(Closed) Need some advice.

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
90 posts
Worker bee

Well, you know she’s been lying to you.  You know she’s been flirting with someone else.  You know she doesn’t respect your wishes (which are by no means “controlling”).  And instead of being proud of the fact that you two are engaged, she still calls you her boyfriend.  Sorry, but I think its time to call it quits and find someone you really can trust and who is proud to be with you.

Post # 4
Member
90 posts
Worker bee

I’m sorry I don’t have a more optimistic view on the situation… 🙁

Post # 5
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee

@husbandtobe:  meh youre 19, there will be other more faithful girls for you to love. run. fast.

Post # 6
Member
9190 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

This sounds sketchy as hell :/ She’s obviously enjoying the naughtiness of flirting (and more?) with this guy. Unless one has good self-control, there’s only one way that ends up (cheating) and this chick doesn’t sound like she has or cares to have good self control. I’m really sorry :/

Post # 7
Member
3552 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

If you are 19 how old is she? It kind of sounds to me like she’s young and isn’t completely ready to settle down yet. I definitely think the going behind you back and name-calling (controlling) you to others is not good relationship behavior. I would have a very honest conversation with her about how her actions make you feel, and if she isn’t willing to change her behavior to accomodate your feelings. I would rethink the relationship a bit.

Post # 8
Member
3580 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

She doesn’t sound like she respects you or the seriousness of your relationship. Drop her like a bad habit and move on. It’ll be hard but you’re in your prime. Strike while the iron is hot.

Post # 10
Member
1306 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I really feel that she is not ready to let go of her ex for whatever reason. If I were you, I would ove on. It will be difficult, but if you want to settle down, you should really be with someone who shares that goal. Also, it seems you both have different views about what is appropriate or not when conversing with people of the opposite sex.

Post # 11
Member
227 posts
Helper bee

Sounds to me like she isn’t ready to settle down. She may have liked the idea of getting engaged but actually being engaged is a little much for her so she is still out searching and flirting and having her fun. I would say she sounds immature but really she is just young and dumb… at 26 she will look back and wish she was never that girl. Don’t let her leave you jaded because one young girl. But I would walk away. There are plenty of girls that would love your loyalty. Trust me she will regret this later. 

Post # 14
Member
298 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@husbandtobe:  Can you really picture the.rest.of.your.life. going this way? not trusting her (bc she is untrustworthy) and feeling the need to check up on her and having her therefore feel “controlled” (<<defense mechanism btw). I mean, if I were in the exact situation, it wouldn’t be worth it. 

Post # 15
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Leave her. She’s not worth it. She obviously doesn’t respect or care too much for your feelings if she continues to talk to this guy, after knowing how much it hurts you. Sorry to be blunt, but from an outsiders perspective, thats exactly what it looks like

Post # 16
Member
6215 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

She doesn’t respect you and doesn’t portray you in a positive light to other people. She doesn’t sound ready to be married. I think you should take this as a learning experience instead of investing more time into someone who doesn’t seem right for you

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