- 8 years ago
- Wedding: October 2012
This is a follow up on my not supposed to live together for 4 mths topic. Im sorry to start a new thread on this but I didn’t think it would be seen on the previous post. I’m in much need of advice/support. Fi and I were told by our pastor that if we did not seperate for the four months prior to our marriage he would not marry us. After a lot of debate fi and I decided to do it and made arrangements with his aunt and uncle to have me move in with them. However..
The fours mths starts this Wednesday and this has caused nothing but bad in our relationship. Fi and I rarely fight but the idea of ACTUALLY carrying this out has caused nothing but hurt and anger and pain. Neither of us knows what to do anymore. His aunt is excited for me to move there. Fi is now against it completely but will do whatever I want. I don’t know what I want anymore. We fight about whether we ate doing this to satisfy the pastor or God. We both really don’t want to follow through anymore but I can’t bear to think about finding a new pastor and hurting his aunt. I feel so bad about this because I feel like its my fault we even considered it in the first place. I feel like I’m being punished and put through emotional distress to follow what I thought was Gods way for us. I can’t take the fighting and crying anymore. FI will do whatever it takes make me happy. I feel crazy and I feel like my heart and my head are in a battle and then throw Fiance into the mix who completely doesn’t want to do it. I know in the end it is our decision but why is trying to follow Gods word completely starting to tear us apart? Advice and support is very much appreciated!!