Post # 32
@Oilbesofine: I speak to people about the Bible pretty often and i find many women feel the same way about submission. In the world today many feel it means that the Husband can be Domineering or the boss.Thats def not the case in the true meaning submission. To submit is to yeild or be yeilding this may prove difficult when you dont agree but Husbands have direction on this matter in Ephesians 5:22-33 it speaks thoroughly about submission but look at verses 25,28-33, Its very clear how a husband should treat and love there wife. A husband shows true headship if its done according to Gods way of doing things and what wife wouldnt want to be treated the way outlined in that passage. Another thing a couple can do is put into practice Philippians 2:4 “keeping an eye, not in pesonal interest upon just your own matters, but also in personal interest upon those of the others.” If both individually put there mates interest before there own who would be lacking? I hope this helps and i hope you and your husbands relationship can contiune to grow spiritually.
Im also a very strong willed woman but in my marriage i have truly learned that submission has helped our relationship. I have learned to trust my husbands judgements and he includes me on desicions as well. It didnt come naturally for me but when i saw the blessing in it and how it really does work when you include God in your marriage it makes it easier each day.
Post # 33
submission is a protection for the wife. and when a husband is following Bible princpiles it makes it a pleasure. Marriage is a partnership and common goals should be worked on together. an example is major purchase. what is best for you both, is it what we need? or what i want. After discussion, a decision is made hopefully both agree if not husband should have final decision. A good husband will always if possible consider his wifes wishes.
WE were planning a vacation. I wanted to go on a big road trip. My husband did not want that he had different ideas and i was not a “happy camper” with his thought. It took several days of discussion. Final decision was his, but he took my happyness in mind and we took a great road trip. Both of us were happy and i was touched by his sacrifice for me.
The Bible does not claim that marriage is easy. The apostle Paul was inspired to write that married couples would have to deal with everyday troubles (1Corinthans 7:28) But married couples can do much to lessen the troubles they experience and increase the joy in the family life. we consult the Bible It is better than any “how to book” out there and is never out of style
Asking questions like you have done starts a great discussion, please continue to ask and you will find your answer.
Post # 34
I just talked this over with my Fiance and his words to me were “i think you are pretty submissive to me and what does that make me? submissive in return” Which I guess in a way submissive doesn’t mean letting him do whatever he wants and disrespecting you or your home. Submissive means that if you guys need to make a decision, and you don’t agree with him, then you TALK it over with him in a loving way so that he understands your point of view, and most times, at least in our case, he will come your way, but at the end he IS the head of the household, and he has the last word, and if you don’t agree with it, than just pray to God that he gives him the wisdom to make the right choices for both of you. I also think showing respect to him, not only when you are alone, but in front of others, especially your children, is a way of showing that he is the head of the family. Women have the job of steering the men in the right directions, they are the head, but we are the neck, and we have a lot of power in our home, but it just depends how you use it. I heard once you need to learn to pick your battles, and that’s worked wonders with me so far, hope it works for you.
Post # 35
I think alot of people tend to forget that these words were inspired and also translated. Words and meanings get lost in translation and movement. You can’t be literal with something written age ago, “inspired” by “God” and translated. I was told that submission is another word for support. So thats how I view it. And it should come from both sides of the relationship.
Post # 36
It also says in Colossians 3:19 “Husbands love your wives, and do not be harsh with them” therefore he should never exercise control over you in a manner that is harsh or disrespectful. this verse regarding submission is actually part of my church’s wedding ceremony. However the minister is clear that a man must be gentle with his wife and not exert contlol over her. I think this verse moreso means respect him. Not be controlled! I hope this helps! 🙂
Post # 37
FH and I practice submission in our relationship. It’s not always easy – we are humans, and therefore not perfect! We are working to build a Christ-centred marriage, together.
As others have stated, it’s not a doormat situation. FH does not stomp around, barking orders; I don’t silently sit at his feet, holding a plate for him, either! It’s not master and slave – we are partners, with different jobs. It is possible to be equal in value and have different roles.
We talk about everything; sheesh, we talk about things to DEATH sometimes, it seems. By submitting to him, I put his needs before my own. In turn, he submits back, and puts my needs ahead of his own. When practiced with love, and the right spirit, submission can be a wonderful way of living.
OP you spoke about your concern about being told to do something you’re not comfortable with. Remember that Biblically, women are not called to submit to men who are not behaving in a righteous way. This means that if your husband is truly living in a Christ-like fashion, he would never use his position as head of the family to make you do something you are not comfortable with. If he does, you are not required to submit to him, period.