Need tips on how to make small talk with parents when you are CFBC

posted 3 years ago in No Kids
Post # 2
Member
2732 posts
Sugar bee

Are you serious? You talk to them like anyone else. “I really like your shoes/necklace/shirt, where did you get it?” “What did you do this weekend”? “What do you like to do for fun (sans kids, if you want)? “I’m looking for a new car, do you have any recommendations?” “I want to try out a new Chinese place, where do you like to go?” ETC.

Post # 3
Member
4258 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

I have kids, but I don’t always like to talk about them.  Some parents fall into that just because it is a common ground.  I would make an effort to see if you have any other simialr interests.  I bet they would love to talk about other things…  books, movies, fashion, vacation plans, home stuff.  I know I do.

Post # 4
Member
2805 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

If the conversation gets to be too non stop kid talk, you can always remind them, you don’t have kids, and you can’t relate. 

I get together with a group of friends twice a month, and only one does not have any children. The conversation always ends up getting  towards non stop parent talk. After a bit our friend always speaks up, and we switch gears. No one is offended when she speaks up, and she doesn’t mind some kid talk, just not an evening full of it.

Post # 5
Member
4552 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

To be honest, only ask after their kids if you are GENUINELY interested, otherwise you can open a floodgate of perpetual yawn. If not, stick with other topics like you would in any other conversation. These people aren’t aliens.. they just have children!

Post # 6
Member
996 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

“Oh how cute/fun/nice/adorable” is my generic response… And I’m pregnant! I’m just not much for small talk.

Post # 7
Member
1170 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

mrsaime :  Since this was posted under “No Kids ”  I think the “Are you seious?” comment is unwarranted. 

I’m 48 with no kids.   Yeah I’m freakin serious! 😁

I try to give coworkers 5 or 10 minutes to talk about their kids, then I try changing the subject either to something work related or see if we have anything on common. If it doesn’t help I get on my phone and look at pretty rings.

Post # 8
Member
1796 posts
Buzzing bee

I try to talk to parents about themselves, remember they’re not solely defined by their breeding status. They have hobbies and interests beyond their kids.

Post # 10
Member
2732 posts
Sugar bee

karen12 :  I am CFBC, and I’ve never had a problem talking to people with kids. It astounds me someone doesn’t know how to talk to someone just because they have kids??!!?!?

catapple :  I am CFBC, thank you. It’s very easy to talk to parents.

Post # 12
Member
4054 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

TBH, some people are just like that, and you can either lean into it, or avoid them. I work with someone who talks about her kids SO much. It’s actually a joke in the office to see how she can make any conversation about them. I have a kid, and It’s still annoying AF.

Post # 14
Member
4054 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

catapple :  Well, in the grandkids example, ask what they did. Honestly, I barely know what stage kids should be at, and I have one. If you’re curious about say, whether they’re walking yet, just ask! That’s not offensive or anything. Some woman at work literally just asked me what tricks my son can do. I thought it was hilarious. 

You can ask what grade they’re in, do they like school…if they say their kid gets tired easily, you could ask if it’s bc they do a lot of activities…

Post # 15
Member
205 posts
Helper bee

@mrsaime Just because something is easy for you doesn’t mean it’s easy for everyone. 

@Catapple, I have a lot of coworkers that are parents too. The things we talk about most are food, animals, food, cooking, movies, and food. Did I mention food? lol 

If they start talking about their kids, I don’t really ask questions about them. I mean, if someone mentions their sister or their boyfriend in a conversation, do you start asking questions about that person if you genuinely aren’t interested? If you can turn off the kid alert in your brain and just think about them as people in the story, it could help the conversation flow more freely.

And if someone is regularly talking to me about things like “like how their kid gets tired easily, what their kid wore to school,” -I think this person just isn’t a good conversationalist. Maybe you can ask for funny stories about their kids, that would be more interesting. 

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