- 4 years ago
- Wedding: October 2017
Here’s my conundrum: We decided on a two-year engagement to give us and our guests a lot of time to plan, as most of them live out of state. I just wanted this whole thing to be as relaxed as possible, so I thought two years would give us plenty of time. But now all of the sudden my mom wants to have this planned and done RIGHT NOW (which was the original intent, to some extent) and I want to get moving on things, and it’s stressing me out.
The priest at the church we want to get married at has told us that we can use the church building, but have to bring our own priest because it’s a popular area for non-parishioners to get married. Weird, but fine. So we talked to the priest who we’d like to do the ceremony, and he won’t be able to commit to our date until October 2016. That defeats the purpose of the long engagement– I wish we’d known that sooner so that we could have just done the wedding in 2016! But that ship seems to have sailed, as we want a fall wedding and October is really the only time the maid of honor will be able to attend. So now we’re stuck, and I don’t know what to do, but I think these are my options:
1. Don’t plan anything– no booking venues, photographers, etc.– until this priest says he can do it. This person is important to my fiance, but we desperately want to start planning, partly to just get it all done and out of the way and partly because my mom is panicking over the fact that we don’t have anything locked down yet.
2. Pick a different priest, which my fiance really doesn’t want to do unless totally necessary.
3. Go ahead and plan it all anyways, and either ask a different priest to be our backup person and basically say he’s doing the wedding until our “first choice” can commit (then basically replace the backup with the original, which I really truly do not want to do at all) or just move along under the assumption that we’ll get someone eventually, as we do have several options for people we’d like to do the ceremony. This seems ok but does worry me– what if all five of our potential celebrants can’t do it, but we have the venue etc. booked and no time to rebook/move everything to a different location?
4. Give up on the dream church and reception venue (historic inn) and pick a church where we don’t have to bring our own priest (which likely means a hotel ballroom reception. Not the end of the world, but not my style).
Sorry this is long, it’s a bit of a vent, but I need some advice! What do you think is my best option?