(Closed) Need to use condoms again…noooooooo

posted 6 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
Member
4466 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Eh, I guess I don’t think it’s that big of a deal, intimacy-wise.  My husband and I have been together for 8 years and we used condoms + birth control right up until the wedding.  I actually prefer condoms in a way since they make “clean up” easier!  If we went back to using them, I don’t think it would have a huge effect on our sex life.

Post # 4
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

yeah we use them when I take pill breaks until I’ve been back on for a few days. The only thing I notice is less clean-up for me! He says he doesn’t really notice a difference. Maybe you just need to find a brand that you both like?

Post # 5
Member
88 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

My husband and I went through this exact same thing. I was on birth control pills for about 7 years and I hated being on them. We have been using only condoms for the past 2 years or so and it is not bad at all. You will get into the habit of using them and hardly notice. Also, we have never had a pregnancy scare due to one breaking or slipping or just “forgeting”. I don’t see how people forget to use a condom… eeek!

Post # 6
Member
2981 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Darling Husband and I went back to condoms after the wedding. My sex drive was low when I was on the pill and (this may be TMI) but made me kinda “dry”. Now that I’m off, my drive has been higher but his has been lower due to the condoms! Argh! We still have sex, don’t get me wrong, but I think we’re just not as into it due to the inconvience of dealing with the condom. Some brands sort of desensitize him so we’re working on finding a brand we both like and looking into other alternative forms of BC that doesn’t involve messing with my hormones (spermacide, sponge, charting, etc). I know what you mean about that feeling of going backwards intimacy wise. Your health is definitely the priority tho! Maybe find creative ways to work condoms into foreplay so that it looks exciting rather than “ooh man I gotta wear that thing?”

Post # 7
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I went through/am going through the same thing. When he and I first got together I was on the pill and it was great. Then I stopped taking it due to an unrelated illness. In the meantime, I was diagnosed with a neurological disorder and took a turn for the worse. At that point I decided to try BC pills again. BAD. IDEA. They made me SO SICK AND DIZZY AND GAVE ME MIGRAINES. The dr. officially told me I’d likely never be able to use hormonal BC again, as even the progesterone pills made me ill. So condoms it is for me. 

Danny says it matters more to me than to him. I cry about it sometimes because my illness stops me from being a “normal person”, but Danny doesn’t care, so I guess why should I, right? 

So you’re not alone. 

But just remember that intimacy has less to do with the body than the mind, that’s what Danny told me. True intimacy is all about the mental connection you have to your partner, sex is just expressing that connection physically. What difference does a piece of latex make? The mental connection is still there. 

Post # 8
Member
4327 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

@soyjoy222: Why not have yourself fitted for a diaphragm or a cervical cap? It might take some time out of your life to fit them into place before getting intimate, but at least you get the full spectrum of feeling your partner with you. Condoms aren’t my favorite either, & my husband can’t stay up with them, so I feel your pain.

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