(Closed) Need to vent….

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

I would sit her down and ask her why she is trying to make your wedding about her and not you. Any way that you can do it without her input? Maybe then you can tell her if she doesn’t stop acting this way, then she can take her money and stick it you know where and you no longer need her input!!

Post # 5
Member
106 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I think there are times that you have to pick your battles and some days that it isnt worth it. Take each planning day.. Day to day. frozen drink machine.. umm.. YES.. Bottles on the table no. People have a better chance of walking out with them. The best thing to do is sit her down.. and tell her that your appreciate everything she is doing.. but it isnt how you imagined your Big day. If nothing else.. if you have siblings.. let them tell her. It always seems to come nicer from my sister or my aunt then I could be about it. I tend to be rather blunt about EVERYTHING!

Post # 6
Member
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@StormyRose: Does she listen to your Fiance better than you?  If so, get HIM to talk to her.  If nothing else, use your pregnancy to your advantage ๐Ÿ˜‰

As in… have Fiance go up to your mom and say that her behavior is making you unhappy and upset and that’s not good for the grandchild and would she PLEASE let YOU have it the way you want? (or something like that ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

Sorry you’ve gotta deal with this. ๐Ÿ™  Lots of hugs!!!!!

Post # 7
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

If she wants to give money to YOUR wedding she should realize that it is YOUR wedding.

Look at it this way, are you willing to give up some of the money she is giving you to have things the way you want them? Because it sounds like the “help” she is giving you comes at a hefty price.

Post # 9
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Reading your post just makes my blood pressure shoot through the roof! This is the same thing I was afraid of. If you want to give us money because you want to help us see our dreams come true – then Thank You! If you want to tell me what to do with your money – you can keep it!

Here’s the thing – most people who give money think that they should have a say in where it goes. That being said, can you still have a wedding without her money? If so – tell your mom, politely, that you’ve changed your mind, you don’t need her to help pay for it, and then have the wedding of YOUR dreams.

If you can’t have the wedding you want without her money, then do your best to make her feel like her ideas and opinions are valued, and in the end get what YOU want. Just make sure you’re in charge of ordering things, and take your Fiance with you instead of your mom. Then, when the day gets here – she’s going to be so involved in how beautiful you are, she won’t cause a scene over HER ideas not being represented.

I hope all of this helps. I hate it when brides have to go through this.

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