Post # 1
Hi bees! I’m kind of a lurker here, trying to post a bit more!
I’m going dress shopping on Monday for my June 2015 wedding. I’m really nervous! I’m not one to be in the spotlight, and I HATE trying on clothes.
I’ve been losing weight and since my engagement in September, I’ve gone from about 180 to 170-165 (I’m 5’6). I’ve always had a low self esteem, and I’ve been feeling better about myself, but I’m still really self conscious. My mom, best friend, sisters, and future sister-in-law will be there, and that just seems like a lot of people. My sisters can kind of, accidentally insult me? Almost like subconscious, backhanded insults. I know they mean well and they’re excited so I’m hoping all goes well.
Anyway. Tips on staying positive during dress shopping? I mean, I’m excited at the prospect of finding my dress, but I’m just afraid I’ll be leaving the store empty-handed and in tears. Help.
Post # 2
- Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter's Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle
First, congrats on the weight loss! Second, can you sit down with them all at the start of the appointment and explain that you’re nervous as well as excited? It might help them think about what they say before they say it. Ask them to be constructive if they’re going to be critical – things like “that doesn’t really show off your beautiful waist” rather than “that makes you look fat”. Do you have parts of your body you particularly like and would like to be highlighted by the dress? If they know what you’re looking for, it might help them. Good luck!
Post # 3
I’m having exactly the same concerns! My mother has always been very critical of my weight. I sat down with her about a week ago and basically told her, “Mom, I’m feeling a lot of pressure with the wedding coming up, including about dress shopping. I’m so excited for you to come with me, but since I’m still trying to lose some weight, could you help me stay positive about my body?” Putting it that way seemed to help. Maybe it would help make your sisters aware of their comments as well. I’m also planning to bring a girlfriend along- because she’s super supportive, and because we tend to be less likely to make not-so-nice blunt comments with someone else present.
Post # 4
Congrats on your weight loss! I think so many of us can relate. It’s such an emotional shopping trip!
I wish I had brought spanx and the right bras with me. I think they can help a LOT to give a more accurate idea of how you will look in your dress. I would also do your makeup and hair really nicely that day, possibly in the general hair style you are imagining for your day. Just because I think when you feel pretty when you’re out shopping it can really give you some confidence. Good luck! My mom is the same way! I told her directly to be careful not to be overly critical.
Post # 5
- Wedding: September 2013 - Tuscan Farmhouse
Please don’t worry too much and let it overshadow a wonderful day. I’d advise a conversation to let your group know how much you’re looking forward to dress shopping and how much you want to share the day with them but positive criticism only!! Hopefully the consultant will help and the more supportive members of the group. Enjoy the day!
Post # 6
chirpychappers: Be okay with the samples not fitting. I actually did a trial dress shopping experience on my own at David’s Bridal and nothing fit well. That really threw me off and I felt super anxious going into my real shopping trip, but it was easier to look at a badly fitting dress the second time around.
Post # 7
My mom and sister’s were very tired and hungry and went out of their way to meet me at the salon. Even so, they were very unenthusastic about everything. Get their opinions and feedback, but then I suggest going back on your own once you have an idea of what you like.
And I second putting a bit more effort into your hair and makeup! it makes a huge difference. When I went back by myself I had just had my hair done and decided it was a good time. what a difference that made in how I felt as well.
Post # 8
Thanks for all your advice bees! I talked to my mom, and she and one of my sisters were really good and supportive. My other sister was kind of controlling, but I still found my dream dress!
Post # 9
Oh wow well done! What was the dream dress?
Post # 10
Post # 11
My body type is similar to yours. May I suggest going shopping alone on y our first trip? I went to David’s Bridal alone on a “scouting” mission, and I’m so glad I did! I was able to figure out what things look absolutely awful, and what things are flattering without feeling embarrassed with people I know. So now, when I go with a group, I know exactly what cuts to hone in on and what to stay away from…