(Closed) Never ending LDR / dicouraged

posted 6 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 3
Member
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@squishee:  I’ve been in an LDR for almostg 3 years (engaged for about 2 of them) We are getting married in May and will be LDr for another year after that. I don’t have any problem with it, but we do make sure we see each other for a very long weekend, every few weeks. I think that’s the trick.

Post # 4
Member
5428 posts
Bee Keeper

@squishee:  I might need this job to help pay for my kids college.

Can’t your child, whom is now not really a “child” anymore… pay for his/her own college? Maybe get a partime job or get loans or grants instead of having you pay?

Post # 6
Member
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@squishee:  I’m not too far out of college myself and my parents barely helped me through college.  While I think it’s great that you want to help your son, at some point you need to start putting yourself first.  If you want this relationship bad enough that you’re going crazy not knowing when the LDR part of it is going to end, pick an end date and stick to it.  Your son will figure out how to pay for school whether or not you’re helping him, but you need to be happy, too.  With any luck you’ll find a job and help him as much as you can.  Sorry if I was a bit much, I just hope that you’ll do what will make you happy.  I know I’d want that for my mom.  πŸ™‚

Post # 8
Member
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@squishee:  Awe, I would definitely go if I were you.  Stick it out until he graduates college and then move to be with your Fiance.  It will totally be worth it.  And honestly, if your Fiance really wants to help, I’d let him.  I know my stepdad helped me out with university when my mom and dad couldn’t and I have so much respect for him, I can’t even tell you.  That man has been amazing to my mother, me and my brother.  It blows me away. 

I think it’s great that you want to help your son, but there is always going to be something you could help him with.  Even if he has to struggle a little bit, it will make him stronger in the end.  I almost had to drop out of college my second semester because of finances and I graduated with darn near a 4.0.  Knowing that it was me that was going to be paying back all of those loans really made me take it seriously.

I’m in a LDR right now myself and I know how hard it is to leave.  I kept my job in another state while my Fiance is at graduate school.  As much as I love this job and am so thankful that I found something in my field, it is not worth staying.  After he graduates in May we’re getting married and doing whatever it takes to make it work.  I can’t take this back and forth ‘nonsense’ any more. 

I wish nothing but the best for you! 

Post # 10
Member
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@squishee:  Awe, glad I could help.  It sounds like you really love your son and I’m sure he will want you to be happy.  Best of luck!! 

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