Post # 1
I have been lurking for the past little bit. So first and foremost goodluck to all! This is the first month for us TTC and we seem to be having a few issues and I am hoping to get some advice. We have/had a very healthy sex life until now. I have noticed that since my IUD was removed a few weeks ago that we have both been not in the mood at all. To make it worse when we do BD my DH cannot fishish. He is also working nights during my fertile time which in itself is a problem. I am trying to not worry about it, but honestly it worries me. I will be 37 soon and I feel like the clock is ticking. I have a feeling I am totally out this month for POAS. Any advice to get my DH to relax?
Thanks in advance. Hope I am not the only one with this issue. 🙂
Post # 3
Does he know it’s your fertile window? Sometimes this happens to guys when they feel like they are under too much pressure. I would try not to share the details of TTC with him and just act as though you are turned on and want sex for no other reason just to have sex. I personally don’t know about the IUD issue, but I hope you start feeling like yourself again soon.
Post # 4
I know DH and I dont do well under pressure. Try to give it some time while just having great regular sex.
Post # 5
I would put money on it that he is feeling the pressure. Also i’m not sure about IUD but i know with BCP it takes a little bit for your body to become regular again so don’t get discouraged if it doesnt happen in the first month or two. Maybe just try going at it around your estimated o dates for a month or two and just enjoy it before diving into actual charting and temping?
Post # 6
I agree with PP. We have had the issue where DH can’t get started or finish because of the stress this first month of TTC brings! I think next month I am going to keep it all to my self – as this month he knew I was waiting for that positive OPK and we had issues once I got one and we were rushed at the same time to get out the door to an event but it was the “right time” to BD. It totally sucks! I don’t have many words for advice – but just want you to know you are not alone! Many couples face this issue and it seems if you keep the TTC details to yourself it helps your partner relax.
Post # 7
@LuluH: I keep track but never tell DH my fertile days. I keep track and add in extra days when needed. It worked great but now we have to use IVF due to MFI:(
Post # 8
This happened to us when we first started trying, but as DH got more used to the idea of a baby he seems to not be having problems with this even though he knows it’s “scheduled BD’ing.” So maybe it will get better as your DH gets used to the idea.
Also, my DH said that sometimes the mornings right when waking up are easier because, err, things are already a bit “ready” and more on auto-pilot.
Post # 9
Yes he knows. Very involved and excited. I am going to take all of your advice and not tell him next month.
I am sorry it hasn’t been an easy road for you. Hugs. I will send you tons of positive thoughts for IVF.
Makes me feel better to know we are in the same boat. Here’s to not telling our DH’s our fertile time next month!
I will need to give morning time a second chance. 🙂 Not a morning person. 🙂
Thanks for the kind words, I really appreciate it.
Post # 10
@LuluH: This is only the first month. It’ll get easier! 🙂
Post # 11
Let’s hope so…..or there will be no baby at all. LOL.