Post # 1
Hello all! I need advice regarding the following issue. My husband and I have been married since May 2012. This is a second marriage for both of us. I had a small wedding ceremony with my first husband back in 1998 so I have been there done that. My husband did not have a ceremony with his first wife and he and I were married in a civil ceremony…no vows just signed a form with a witness. He wants to have a ceremony with a preacher, vows and his parents present. I want to surprise him with this (on our 2nd anniversary) because I realize that this is something very importnt to him. Has anyone out there been in a similiar situation? Do you have to get a marriage license and do the whole process over? Any advice wil be greatly appreciated.
Post # 3
@MrsMeredith: Your wedding happened at your civil ceremony. What you’re describing is a vow renewal. You don’t need a marriage license to do this because you are already married. If you’re having guests and the whole nine yards, make sure you call it either a vow renewal or a marriage celebration. It’s not a wedding, you already had one of those.
Post # 4
@MrsMeredith: You are already married, so nothing legal needs to happen. A surprise for your anniversary sounds so neat! It sounds like it will be be small? You could do it at a nice restaraunt. Tell him to meet you at such and such a place for an anniversary dinner and surprise him by having the banquet room reserved with your famaily and close friends and an officiant. I eloped with my husband, and now we are having a vow renewal as well. Good luck with everything, and congrats on your marriage!
Post # 5
Hi @MrsMeredith: First & foremost I see this is your DEBUT post on WBee… so a BIG Welcome to “the Hive”
What a fabulous idea… your organizing this as an Anniversary Gift to him. So romantic & caring as it is something he truly wants.
As the other Bees have stated you are already married… so legally there is nothing you need to do to make it happen… which also makes it a lot easier (and usually a lot cheaper as well… as many Officiants will charge more for a Wedding than a Vow Renewal. For example if you look at a Resort that offers “Destination” type Weddings a Vow Renewal Ceremony could be 100s if not 1000s of Dollars cheaper !!)
A Vow Renewal can be pretty much exactly the same as a Wedding… you are renewing your commitment to each other.
Some Officiants / Jurisdictions tho will change the wording ever so slightly tho “Do you MrsMeredith: vow to continue to ___” etc ) So you’ll need to check with the Officiant to see what they can do for you in that regard.
From an Etiquette perspective, Modern Etiquette dictates that there are very few rules you have to follow (or break) in regards to a Vow Renewal… you can make it as Wedding-like as you wish… Formal / informal – BIG / small etc… the whole 9 Yards (Gowns, Tuxes, Flowers, Reception etc) not the choice is yours.
The one thing tho that isn’t considered kosher tho is to have things that ONLY are meant to happen before one marries the first time… such as a Bridal Shower or a Bachelor / Bachelorette Party (as neither of you are either of these terms any longer)
And just so you know…
The traditional & modern symbols for a 2nd Wedding Anniversary are:
- Gifts – Traditional = Cotton
- Gifts – Modern = China
- Gemstone = Garnet
- Colour = Red
- Flower = Cosmos
Those items might give you some inspiration
Hope this helps,