(Closed) New job requires me to stay until 8-9pm and wasn’t disclosed during interview.

posted 9 months ago in Career
Post # 2
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

I’m not sure of what you should do (in terms of keeping the job or leaving)… my question would be is asking them if this is an unusual week in terms of later meetings, or if this is a regular occurrence?

Post # 3
497 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

1. What does your contract say?

2. What does your boss say?

3. I am unsure on the validity of your ideas about the train. Seems odd and I’m sure hundreds of people commute every evening without event. Regardless, if this is not your preference then it seems that this job (probably the whole marketing industry) is not for you as it would not be regular hours.

Post # 4
9044 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I have no idea why it matters that you are married.

While I agree that it’s frustrating that the schedule isn’t really what was presented in interviews, I’m not sure why you interviewed for the job in the first place given the whole train situation. 

It doesn’t sound like it’s a good fit for you. But if it’s a good opportunity maybe you can make it work. The workload could just need an adjustment period. As for the commute, I took a train to work for years and I just carried pepper spray with me for the times I had to take a late train. 

Post # 5
1114 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2021 - City, State

I don’t see what being married has to do with anything either, why wouldn’t it suit someone who is married? Are married people only meant to work to 5:30 and spend the rest of their time with their partner?

Also, I’m not sure where you live but I’m not getting the big deal about the train either, Im sure many women get the train solo in the evening. 

I don’t really think this job is for you, you seem to have this in your head that standard hours are 9-5 so you can justify not staying. Just leave and let someone else have the role who doesn’t mind the hours

could you learn to drive and commute that way? 

Post # 6
1025 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

My company has a policy that if you work after 9 PM they pay for the Uber/taxi – can you discuss something similar with them? That will incentivise them to get you out of there earlier and give you peace of mind.

while the hours weren’t explicitly discussed in the interview, a service-based start up is always going to have long hours as you’re at the mercy of clients. 

Where are you located that commuter trains are empty after 7 PM? That just seems so weird to me! I could understand trains after 11 or 12 but 7 PM seems like a very normal time to be coming home from work to me?

yhen again my manager schedules “afternoon” meetings at 6 30 sooooo I’m probably not the best person to talk to about normal hours :S

Post # 7
4628 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Yeah, the married/ not married bit is moot. 

I think the job sounds a bit annoying, but not undealable. 

Are you SURE nobody eats lunch? That seems crazy excessive. I work in a hugely busy organisation, and can still find the time to poke my fork at a salad between customer contacts. 

Post # 8
8832 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2017 -  California

First off, agree with PPs that you being married has nothing to do with this. 

Second, also agree with PPs that this just doesn’t sound like a good fit. This: “It’s a startup boutique marketing agency that represents 30+ clients so they basically have to run things as the clients dictate” seems completely incompatible with your desire to not have to take that “late” 6:45 train. 

Third, again agree with PPs that it seems really odd that a 6:45 train is so empty/dangerous. And the conductor personally telling you that it’s not safe for young women just seems so strange to me—like a conversation from the 1800s or something. 

Anyway, given all of this, I’d ask if this kind of schedule is the exception or the rule. But really, even if they tell you it’s an exception, I’d wager a guess that this won’t be the job for you given the need to be on clients’ beck and call. 

Post # 9
1407 posts
Bumble bee

Everyone above is correct in suggesting that being married doesn’t matter in the slightest, but the fact remains that you were clear about your significant limitations regarding when you would be available to do the job and they made it seem like the job was compatible with that. It would appear that is not going to be the case. You need to have a chat with your boss to see if this is a weird week or perhaps they have different expectations of your time than you initially understood. From how things have gone so far it seems like the company isn’t a good fit for you.

It may be less stress all around to find a job in the suburbs if you are concerned for your safety on the train at 7pm.

Post # 10
1744 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

mrstravelbee12 :  “I was absolutely expecting to work hard and well over 40 hours per week.” Um, everything you write sounds like you absolutey weren’t expecting to work  well over 40 hourse per week because that would, logically always be past 5 oclock so I am actually quite surprised at your statement. When would these overtime hours otherwise then be!??!

I think this job is not a good fit for you. I don’t want to be mean or anything, but you don’t sound like a really motivated and engaged option for a start-up so maybe you should do everyone (and especially yourself) a favor and look for something with super regular hours. Not everyone wants and enjoys the kind of challenge and sacrifice a young company requires from it employees and there is no shame in that. Look for something else, Bee.

Post # 11
5508 posts
Bee Keeper

Another Bee who doesn’t understand what being married has to do with anything–married people work late just like everyone else. 

It sounds as if the clients dictate the schedule, not you. Find a different job, Bee. 

Post # 12
700 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

This job isn’t a good fit for you.  I’ve worked at a start up before,  they require a lot of extra hours. I worked 15 hour days and weekends  while there.  It’s ok to not want that.   I’m now at a point in my life where I won’t work any OT. I would look for another job that fits the hours you can work.

Post # 13
1016 posts
Bumble bee

Shesaidyes :  It sounds like she was expecting to be able to work from home in the evenings.  But I agree, if the clients dictate the schedule then the job is not a good fit for someone who wants to be able to leave work at 5pm most days (which is a completely reasonable thing to want, although likely not possible at a place like this).

OP, I’m sorry they didn’t make you fully aware of what the schedule would be like during the interview, particularly since it sounds like you were very clear with them about what you were looking for.

Post # 14
2759 posts
Sugar bee

I agree with ozbee: perhaps the marketing industry itself is not a good fit for you. The marketing/advertising/communications fields are very client-oriented and it is implicitly expected that professionals in those fields will be flexible about the working hours. There’s a saying in my country about these fields: You know at what  hour you go in the office, but you don’t know when you will leave.

Post # 15
115 posts
Blushing bee

You are right that your being married is extremely important. It disturbs me that so many people dismiss it as a non-factor. What is the point in marrying someone and then not prioritizing spending time with them? It’s perfectly ok to prioritize a job over one’s spouse?

Even if you were single, this type of job is terrible. It takes up your entire day and you whole life. They call them soul-sucking jobs, and anyone who wants to actually live a full life should avoid them. You rightly pointed out that these working hours are not for people who have any life or hobbies outside of work.

In your situation I would stay for 6 months. If the schedule is still consistently stealing my time and quality of life, I would then leave the job. I would say, well I gave it a chance but it was stealing my life from me. You don’t want to die while slaving away at some job, and in your last moments feel regret that you didn’t even spend time with your husband and take up a nice hobby.

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