Post # 1
In December my partner interviewed for a position in the East coast office of a company based on the West coast. It is a dream job and we agreed we’d move there if he received the offer. I was planning to work remotely with my current East coast organization.
While he has been waiting to hear back, my work life changed, as my organization abruptly restructured and I was asked to take over a new area. It’s a great opportunity, a nice promotion, however I need to physically be in the East coast office for this position. I’ve been given some time to think about it, although higher ups have intimated that I need to accept the position to ensure security with the organization. “we don’t know if we’ll have the luxury of supporting out of office staff for the long term”. And of course, last week, my partner receives the dream job offer-on the west coast.
Here’s my question. Given this development, do you think that my partner can ask /negotiate with the dream job to work in the small East coast office? He was asked several times during the interview period about his seriousness in relocating and he assured them he was. We were! Then llfe changed in a few months. He’s afraid he will come across as having lied, and either a)getting what he wants and starting off on a very sour note b)having the offer rescinded and potentially burning a bridge.
Id appreciate any outside feedback. We just don’t know how he can handle this with the new folks. Thanks.
Edited to add, we are not sure we are prepared to move if he can’t get the location change. We are concerned that ultimately I would lose my position if I turn down the East coast promotion and I enjoy my work and organization that I have been with for 6 years. His current position is ending in April so he really needs to secure something soon though, and this opportunity is fantastic for him. We feel like the distance is too far to bridge though we have done distance in the past we dont want to do it again.
Post # 3
I think that since he’s received the offer, it doesn’t hurt for him to check. He can briefly explain that there’s been a change in circumstances and that, while he will move if it’s necessary, it would be wonderful if he could work out of East Coast office. I don’t think it would be wise to negotiate or push it if they’re not receptive to the idea, since (like you said) that would likely make him look bad/end up with rescinded offer. But I can’t imagine that politely/ non-aggressively testing the waters would have a strong negative impact on his situation with the firm.
Post # 4
Could his dream job support both of you on the West Coast? If so, could you work remotely for now & get a new job on the West Coast?
If you absolutely can not leave your job & he can’t take the dream job, he needs to let the employer know ASAP. By now, they’ve likely let all other applicants know the job has been filled.
I agree w/ AGirlWithARing, it doesn’t hurt to check. I don’t think it would make him look bad at all either.
Post # 5
Thank you all for your thoughts. I should mention that if I was not initially told by my organization that my permanent position could be done via telecommute, that he would not have seriously pursued the West coast job. There was never an intention for me to leave my job, it is not the type of position that grows on trees and I am too far in my career to make lateral moves. And the East coast market is better for both us professionally, the dream job is just a bit of an anomaly being out West.
I want him to have this job. But my job security and advancement is as important, and thankfully, he is willing to turn down the job if we cant figure out how to make it all come together. I’m just hoping it doesn’t come to that.
Thanks for your thoughts.
Post # 6
That’s so tough. Has he had other bites on the East Coast? It’s a tough job market out there, it might be hard for him to find a job no matter where he is. I would have him ask them about the other office, just letting them know that things changed and see what they way. It sounds like you possibly aren’t going to be able to move because of your position It all depends on who has a job that can be filled more easily and compromise.
Post # 7
Wow that’s hard!! What is his job?? I agree if it doesn’t work with the West Coast job. Could you afford to move to the East coast on your salary alone? Or on his salary alone on the West Coast? Where in the East Coast is the job? Location is everything when it comes to costs. I know you said that you didn’t want to do the distance thing but could it work for alittle bit until after a couple months to see if he couldn’t move out to the east or just mention it up front.
I’ll pray for you as that is definitly a tough decision, but in this economy it’s a GOOD decision to have. I wish you both the best of luck, let us know what you end up doing!
Post # 8
I’m all for him testing the waters. Go for it, but gently.
Ultimately though you have to decide: Either you get your dream job or he does.
Post # 9
I’m assuming if you both had to chose between jobs, you’ve both already decided taht you’d stay with yours. That’s what I got from your last post.
IMO, he should:
1. let the West Coast job know today that unfortunately things have changed & he wanted to let them know as soon as possible.
2. Tell them that you are unable to telecommute as originally told by your employers and you just now found out. He cannot move to the West.
3. He could say he is able to work out of the East Coast office, if they have a position available.
4. He should thank them very much for the opportunity & apologize for it not working out.
Maybe don’t use my wording, but those are the things I’d say. It may “burn bridges” with that company, or it may not… but if you can’t move, than you can’t. I’m sorry, it sucks your job told you that you could telecommute then went back on it. At least you found out before you moved West!