Post # 1
I’m curious how many of you are keeping your maiden name, how many of you are taking your FH’s last name, and how many of you are hyphenating. If I decided to hyphenate, my initials would be ESP. Pretty silly, right? My FH has strong feelings about me taking his last name without a hyphen and I don’t’ have strong enough feelings one way or another to pick a fight over it.
What are you doing and why?
Post # 3
Taking his last name. Not taking it never even crossed my mind. I’m not a huge fan of it (mine is way easier to pronounce) but I feel like part of getting married is taking your husbands name so thats what I’m doing.
No offense to those who aren’t though. To each their own!
Post # 4
I took my husband’s last name because I always knew that I would do that. I guess I am just traditional in some ways. Although it’s just symbolic, I wanted something showing that my husband and I are our own familiy.
Post # 5
I’m legally hyphenating only not to have to change credit cards and all (been married before, harder to change back than change to…lol) but will be known as Mrs since both our last names together are a tongue twister….lol. No one but us know I’m hyphenating it. He doesn’t care either way, but for the first time I can say I WANT to take his name… :). Also kept my maiden name for professional purposes before since all my licenses had my maiden name, socially known as Mrs. but never legally.
Post # 6
I waited 40 years to be a Mrs. and I want to do it all out.
Post # 7
I’m not changing my name. I think it’s cool when people change their name, but it’s not for me at all. It’s my name and it’s not changing. No conflict here, because I wouldn’t be with anyone who had a problem with that.
Post # 8
I took his name. Similar to EvaBostonTerrier, I just always knew I would, regardless of whatever it was. Ironically, when I was around 10 or 11 years old, I started showing cattle in the same organization as him (how we met). His family owns a profitable ranch with really good cattle, so he and his brother would win a lot, and when they’d announce it on the PA system I’d always snicker because I guess it was a funny last name to me. Now karma got her payback and it is my last name. Sweet, sweet poetic justice. 🙂
But back to the main point, I also considered taking my maiden name as a second middle name, but by the time I got to filling out the Social Security papers, I just said screw it!
Post # 9
I changed mine to his.
I would have kind of preferred to keep my own, but like you said, not enough to pick a fight over, and he REALLY wanted me to.
Post # 10
I’m taking his name, but honestly, I’ve struggles with this. My maiden name is hispanic, his last name is caucasian. I kind of feel weird about losing my ethnic last name because the name will end with me since there are no boys in the family to carry it on. I feel more wierd about keeping my maiden name, though ( I don’t know why but I do). I thought about hyphenating it, but then my name would be M. Montoya-Miller. Not crazy about the overload of M’s! So, I voted that I’m taking his name. He seems to REALLY want it that way anyway.
Post # 11
(Some of you know-) DH took my name. It was his idea and he is really happy about it. I am too.
Post # 12
He was wanting to take MY last name! But, we are probably going to take his still:(
I feel better because my middle name will be both my birth middle name and my maiden name…so I will go from 3 to 4 names……KDA to KDAG
Post # 13
I grew up with two last names and it pretty much sucked especially since people were confused that it wasn’t hypenated. I’m planning on taking his name.
Post # 14
Honestly, I have never understood the appeal of changing one’s last name on marriage. It always seemed to me to symbolize the fact that the husband would go right on as he had before, while the wife was expected to make the marriage her whole life. Yes, I kept mine.
As for doing it because he wanted me to: I basically told him that if he wanted us to have the same name, he was welcome to change to mine. When he thought about what a pain that would be, he had a better appreciation for why I wouldn’t want to do it.
Post # 15
This was tough for me. I LOVE my last name, and it has become a pretty solid part of my identity over the years (friends tend to call me by both my first and last name when they address me, as if the two were hyphenated). Also, my mother and father did not go to university, and I will be graduating with a PhD in a couple of years–they’re very proud of this (more so than I am!), and I like the idea of honouring my family by publishing under my maiden name. BUT I also value the symbolism of creating a new family by sharing a surname, AND since my fiance is Jewish, and I am converting before the wedding, it is also special to me to have a Jewish name.
SO…my current plan is to change my middle name to my maiden name, change my last name to his, and publish under my full name. That’s the plan at this point, anyway!
Post # 16
This is pretty much how I feel. I can understand that other people look forward to changing their name, or don’t like their name, are happy to leave behind the name of an estranged father, or whatever. But I am very strongly attached to my name, and never expected to change it. When I found out he kind of wanted me to, I was a little surprised, but once I was able to really think about it, that only made me more determined to keep my own (I’ve got plenty of time to do other nice things for him). Also, my name is awesome, so I’m extra biased. The name change thing? Just not for me.