(Closed) New LDR..

posted 8 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 3
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

It’s so tough being in an LDR.  The best advice I have is to have phone ‘dates’ and make sure that you plan for when you are going to visit eachother.  Good luck!

Post # 4
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I’m in the same situation.  It’s a very stronge possibility that my fiance may be moving out of our apartment in San Diego to take a job in LA.  She would be staying with her parents on weekdays and coming home on the weekends.  It doesn’t seem impossible, but it certainly doesn’t seem easy. 

Just look at the bright side, you know that you can move to Nashville in a few months.  So keep that short time frame in mind, and just make sure to give your relationship lots of attention. 

Post # 5
Member
187 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Sorry to hear plans are changing…as for how to “deal” with LDR I think it’s something every couple does differently. We talk every night before bed, even if its just to say goodnight if it’s been a long day and we don’t have much energy to talk. We also to gchat video. I certainly makes wedding planning harder but the reward will be a little sweeter (in my opinion!). 

As for jealousy, I’ve never felt that, more jealous that I can’t be there with him. I think you have to have complete trust in your man, and never question him. That will break down a relationship. Just remember while he starts a new life there that will soon be your life so it’s like he’s starting your soon to be life a little early! My Fiance moved to our new apt 4 months before me and I’m joining him there after the wedding so he keeps telling me about the town, places/people we’ll meet, etc.

Good luck! LDR is challenging but reaally helps your communication skills! If you ever need to talk feel free!

Post # 7
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Just one day at a time. We did it for about 4 1/2 years and we went 8 month gaps without seeing each other b/c he’s military. You just have to focus on the “you” bubble and school will definitely help–the two semestesr i was in school were the FASTEST because i always had stuff going on to distract myself from the lonliness. Sometimes i just felt sad and bummy, but it never interfered greatly with my life or anything!

As far as jealousy, I don’t think we would’ve made it unless we were both VERY not jealous. I went to a 75% male school and I would not have put up with him being jealous. I just wouldn’t have had it. And I know he wouldn’t have tolerated that with me. If you think jealousy is going to be an issue, you need to talk about it and work out why and what situations you’d be jealous in and what would make them okay–like if your Fiance goes out at night (trust me, mine went out a lot! more so i just wanted to be there, too!!!!), and as long as he texted me to know he was okay and when he got home, i was appeased. Just be sensitive to each other’s needs.

Post # 8
Member
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Don’t think about it as him having a “new life” — think about it as him torturously surviving your absence until the next time he gets to see your lovely face!  Really!  It’s true.  😉  And in the meantime, take a cue from him and find a way to keep busy.  Distractions, distractions, distractions!

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