(Closed) New to the site…soon to be engaged but dont know how to feel.

posted 6 years ago in Proposals
Post # 3
Member
6248 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 1900

Welcome to the Hive!

Poke around here and you’ll soon see that it’s very common for girls to pick out their own e-rings nowadays.  You’re not alone!

Post # 4
Member
1226 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Hun don’t worry yourself too much. My Fiance and I agreed to get engaged before he proposed too, lol. I even sent him pictures of rings I liked… with regret because it made me feel the same way you do. His proposal didn’t sweep me away, but he did get down on one knee and proposed to me when I looked like crap, seriously I was in my grungy houserobe after JUST waking up. I had to ask him to put the ring on my finger LOL. But then he said what matters to me, like ”i want to spend the rest of my life with you, be the father of you children, I’d be lost without you…”. try not to drive yourself nuts with the details, it will never be perfect. What matters is that you will finally marry your lifemate, he wouln’t propose if it wasn’t what he wanted too <3.

best wishes!

 

Post # 5
Member
1226 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I told myself it meant more that he proposed when I looked my worst :P, hehe

Post # 6
Member
8042 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

I’m picking my ring. If the ring is all you’re concerned about, then I wouldn’t worry.. but if it’s something bigger, you should figure it out before you marry this guy.

Post # 9
Member
36 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2014

You are definitly not the only one!! I didn’t pick out the exact ring I got, but I went around with him to some jewellery shops to show him the style.  I think it is fairly common now-a-days 🙂

Post # 10
Member
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

hey there!

My Fiance actually didn’t “propose” at all – we have been dating for over 6 years, and we just one night were talking after a few drinks about our upcoming trip to vegas, and wouldn’t it be great to just elope… well we didn’t do that, because my mom would kill me, but our conversation turned from joking to serious, and he admitted that he was planning on asking me this summer, but now that it’s out in the open, let’s just do it now!  So we just… DECIDED to be engaged! haha. no ring, no anything.  he eventually got me a ring, but it was such a casual ordeal!  it doesn’t offer up any romantic story, but what the best part is is seeing him grow more and more excited for this wedding.  I can see by your post that the same thing is happening to your Fiance.  Just enjoy your moment, whether it be big or small, and focus on the most exciting part that is still to come! Smile

Post # 11
Member
6256 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

We picked out my ring together, too. I think you two are already committed, and if he hadn’t wanted to go along with your plans, you gave him ample opportunity to say “no.” So you didn’t strongarm him or henpeck him or give him an ultimatum. You insisted on marriage, which according to at least two books I’ve read, is sometimes not only a good thing, but actually what it takes to get any forward momentum going.

You should be enjoying this time! Be happy!

Post # 12
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Hello Smile

 

I have a very similar relationship with my boyfriend, and in fact just recently put up my own post freaking out about a proposal! HAHA! We’ve also been together for 8 years, no children, but then again we never want to have them. Let me tell you from my recent experiences that picking out your ring (or at least what you like in a ring) is very normal and I think a smart move. If he loves you he’ll want to do it right, and if he thinks the right thing is for you to pick out what you like, then so be it. Every couple is different, so it’s whatever works for you guys. I personally think it’s great he wanted to know what you like in a ring, besides, you’re the one who will be wearing it the rest of your life LOL! 

 

My question for you is if you’re feeling the way I’m feeling now–I’m so anxious, I’ve been waiting so long for a proposal that now I know he has the ring I just want him to do it already! He’s planned this nice date night for us Saturday and I don’t want to be upset if he doesn’t do it then, so I’m worried. 

 

On another note, I’m happy for you that your man came around and is ready for the next step with you! Congrats on your future engagement Smile

 

Post # 15
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I went through this and am still going through it to some degree. I feel like “postpartum” or something on the engagement right now. 

We got engaged for our nine year anniversary this past weekend, and I had to nudge and pick out the ring, too. I wondered also if I’d have a proposal story, because of it. But I do have one. I had told my Fiance that it would be impossible to surprise me because I knew everything going on. Well, he threw in kink in what I knew when he told me he didn’t “feel like” paying for the ring!

I didn’t speak to him for a whole week. Well, I went back and forth speaking and pouting and mopping, and then he told me he was coming totown to see me, but not if I’m pouting about this ring and why he didn’t get it. So I said fine and he came to visit. Then he made an excuse about having to go somewhere on Saturday for 2 hours. That was fishy, but since I trust him, I knew he hadn’t paid for the ring, so I had to keep telling myself he wasn’t trying to sneak off to get it.

So then he took me to get all my favorite stuff and took me to the lake for our anniverysary. That’s where we went for our first date when the restaurants were all closing, but we still wanted to be around each other. 

So he started rambling while we were there, and I’m trying to figure out when we are going to eat the food we picked up. Suddenly, it occured to me that he was giving me “the speech.” Next thing you know, he handed me the ring box and proposed.

He said he’d been scared that I was gonna break up with him for telling me “I don’t feel like” paying on the ring. You guys gotta know how that phrase stung. I’m still rolling my eyes at that statement, but it’s all good cause we’re engaged.

But now, I feel weird cause all the ring planning and engagement talk and hoopla is gone. I know now is time for the wedding talk and hoopla, but I just feel like a car that ran out of gas. I suddenly feel directionless and I don’t know what to do. He thinks I don’t want to marry him now that it’s real. That’s not the case. It’s just–I don’t know–postpartum engagement is the only way I can explain it. 

Maybe you should do what I did and tell your SO that your leery that, since you participated, you won’t be surprised, and if there’s any way he can finagle a surprise or special moment out of this, you will really appreciate it. I’m telling you, my Fiance is not creative, and I am surprised that he pulled off this surprise on me. He said he’d expected me to call the jeweler to find out if he’d paid for it, but it’s because I trust what he says that I didn’t bother doing that. I mean, we’ve been doing this 9 years. If he tells me no, then I know that it’s no–know what I’m saying?

So you might have to tell him you feel this way. I simply told my Fiance, “I don’t know how you’re gonna surprise me cause…” And he’d just listened to me without saying anything. So I guess he took that as a challenge! LOL

 

The topic ‘New to the site…soon to be engaged but dont know how to feel.’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors