(Closed) Newly engaged and I HATE how I look in pics, help please

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
9524 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Yes! I always look drunk/ tired in pictures no matter how sober and awake I am. The Fiance looks grumpy or tired. We plan on doing modeling classes and dance classes. It sounds silly but he insisted. We also told our photographer when we had a consultation. A professional worth hiring should know how to pose you to look your best.

keep in mind that you are your worst critic. I’m sure you will be so happy and excited with a big smile, you will look gorgous!

Post # 3
Member
893 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
minniegrace:  Ugh, me too! I feel like I look alright in person but when I see pictures I’m just like, “really??” And I know it’s just being completely unphotogenic, not ugly. I haven’t taken any pictures for engagement/wedding purposes, but I’ve heard and seen that a really good photographer will know how to capture your good side. You should find someone with a portfolio in which the people look good and talk to the photographer about your insecurities and how you can work around them in photos. Certain poses might be more flattering and whatnot. If you have great professional pictures, then you can be happy knowing that no matter how many “bad” pictures of you were taken by others, you will have your beautiful professional ones. You could even start taking practice pictures know, so you’ll know what angles and expressions look best for your face. 

Also, a little sidenote: We definitely judge ourselves way too harshly. I’m sure other people don’t think that you look as bad as you think you do.

Post # 4
Member
9163 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Also, a little sidenote: We definitely judge ourselves way too harshly. I’m sure other people don’t think that you look as bad as you think you do.

In some ways that almost the worst  part for me, in that  I say oh god look at  that , my hair my …whatever, I can’t look that  bad irl, and someone says, what’s wrong  , you look fine , that’s how you look….

Post # 5
Member
314 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

Have a glass of wine- and go spend some time with the photographer in advance if you can.  Taking good pictures of yourself requires practice- pose- find pictures you like- practice posing- practice smiling-

 

My friend jokingly asked me to teach her the ways of a good selfie- I just took a screen shot of my gallery from the picture I had literally just posted- it was almost 20 pictures of the same thing- just keep taking till you get the right one-she was like- oh hell no- I aint got time for that.. but as a performer- I have to be in pictures- a lot more than normal- so I practice so I don’t look ridiculous.   It sounds down right silly and feel quiet a bit vain to always be posing in a mirror- but it’ll REALLY helps.

 

Congrats! by the way!! 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 10 months ago by  JoRocka.
Post # 6
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Unless you have had a lot of professional pictures taken and hate all of them, I really wouldn’t worry. Happy snaps are VERY different to the kind of picture you get taken at a professional wedding or engagement shoot. Hire a decent, experienced photographer who knows how to pose and communicate and you really have nothing to worry about. Just remember that you often get what you pay for.

Post # 7
Member
509 posts
Busy bee

It’s amazing what a good photographer can do.  He or she will advise you how to stand/pose to look your very best.  I’m sure you’re the only one who feels like you look awful.  We judge ourselves so harshly. 

A lot of very wise bees on here have often said that every bride looks magnificent on their wedding days.

As much as you want them “perfect”, nothing is, and they won’t be, you’ll always find flaws.  I can assure you though, that when others look at them, they’ll be lovely,

Post # 8
Member
124 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - Restaurant

View original reply
minniegrace:  You should worry. I now how you feel…I am also scared D: especially since they are very expensive! But, you know what? I don’t want to get all work up because of that. I know that I’ll regret even more not having any wedding pictures and, even if I don’t like them inmmediately, eventually I will come to treasure them as the memories they represent♥ 

Post # 9
Member
1219 posts
Bumble bee

I feel your pain.  I hate having my picture taken.  I never look good.  If I really look like I look in photos, then I am never leaving the house again.  I looked okay until I was in my mid 30s.  Then something happened.?.  The HR at guy work even made fun of my photo for my badge.  Geez, he is HR, he of all people should know better.  Worst thing is, once people know you don’t want your picture taken, it becomes their mission in life to get your photo every chance they get.  I don’t get why people want to make me feel uncomfortable.  Oh yeah, then camera phones came out. Ugh.

Post # 10
Member
2995 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I wouldn’t worry too much. I didn’t even notice my photopher during my wedding ceremony, I was so happy and focused on taking my vows. 🙂 

You’re going to look like you in all of your wedding photos. I know, because even with the sparkly white dress, the professional hairstyling and the really great makeup, I looked like a dork with bad hair in all of my wedding photos with Darling Husband because I was too caught up in the *~emotions~* of the day to remember to look in a mirror, which is so me. Kind of mad that nobody else noticed and said, “Hey, is_a_belle, FIX YOUR DAMN HAIR” but what’s done is done.

You learn to appreciate the photos for what they are, a way to preserve the memories of your wedding day, because trust me, it’ll be such a whirlwind that your brain will short circuit and kind of remember the day like this: “Dress weighs a ton corset is too tight can’t eat there’s music and OMG Darling Husband SO HANDSOME! Everyone cries and we kiss and people hug us I eat three bites of food and there’s dancing my legs are sweaty my feet hurt and OOH CAKE!!! The end!” 

Post # 11
Member
705 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

IMO I have never been captured fairly on a photo, lol! I don’t usually hate how I look in pics, but I’m close to never satisfied. I’m always like “that’s NOT how I look! I’m prettier IRL!”, haha! BUT, on the other hand I know many girls who looks amazing in pictures but when you see them IRL, you’re like “WTF?! Who is she?!”. 

I rather look good IRL and look less good in pics, then the other way around. 

Post # 12
Member
3035 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

A professional photographer can make a world of a difference! I promise! I never like taking photos either but a professional can make you look so much better.

For example… here’s one of my engagement photos and a photo my fiance took a couple weeks ago for mothers day. The lighting isn’t great. I wasn’t standing in a very flattering position. IMG_6837

Post # 13
Member
406 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
minniegrace: As with most of the ladies above, I know how you feel. My teeth are too small and I grin with my gums, but probably worse is what I did to myself. A few years ago I had a dental implant done, which included a bone transplant (long story short, the tooth never initially grew in and I was assured by the oral surgeon and the dentist that this was the best, safe long-term option). Unfortunately, my body rejected the donor bone, and I was required to have a follow up surgery. I’m left with a dark scar on my gum line and a lopsided smile because the fake tooth juts out.

Essentially, I’m a beautiful woman until I smile. And that’s not an exangeration, I’ve forced close friends down and make them tell me the truth about if how I look in photos is how I look in real life. No one has said it aloud, but they do remain silent and don’t deny it.

As someone who is desperately afraid to have engagement / wedding photos taken, I feel as though I don’t have any advice for you. Just know that you are loved by your Fiance, even if you may not love your nose and smile. Acceptance is the greatest form of comfort. Attempt to stifle the words of the world and as it tells you through media that any part of you is not beautiful.

And if you figure out how to drown out the disapproval of self, let me know your secret. <3

Post # 14
Member
760 posts
Busy bee

I feel ya on not looking forward to all the pictures. My face is only flattering in about 2 positions or else my teeth look weird, my face doesn’t look thin, or something else happens when I go to smile in pictures. I will say that I also take HORRIBLE candid photos. My laugh face just isn’t meant to be candid so I think I’ll try to keep that in mind if I see our photographer around snapping pics (which I know will be hard to do).

Post # 15
Member
760 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
minniegrace:  My only piece of advice would be to practice poses in the mirror. Not just body poses that you think are flattering but also how to turn your face in close-ups or which side of your face your prefer. For me, I know I prefer my left side because of my teeth. No one notices but me, but I feel better about not having to worry and told my photographer that for staged photos I would prefer to be in the left. For the ceremony I assume that usually I stand to the left so people will only see my right side, but what can you do? Candid photos you just have to go with it. I take horrible candid pictures and you can’t pose all night just in case you might be in a picture. 

The topic ‘Newly engaged and I HATE how I look in pics, help please’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors