- 5 years ago
- Wedding: May 2015
I have to complain just a little. 😛 Long rant warning!
A friend of mine, who got married last October and who I lost touch with due to her being married (I tried to keep in touch, never heard back), just had a baby a couple weeks ago. I found out because a little sign was posted at the small natural foods co-op I go to, and where she used to work. It was the weirdest thing. At first I was SO happy for her, because she had been desperately wanting to get married and start having children, and it all happened incredibly fast for her, and seems to have worked out really well so far. Then I suddenly felt horrible. She got married after knowing her man less than a year (she is part of a religious/cultural group where this is normal), and suddenly they have a baby. And I’ve been with my man 4 1/2 years and counting, and even though we will probably be engaged in the next few months, it’s still hard. Especially since I’m in grad school– the last semester before I do independent work on my thesis, thank goodness, since that means I won’t have to be at school away from my SO for half of each week.
Hearing that my old friend had a baby made me feel so weird and behind in life and just awful about how school seems to be holding the rest of my life back. I know that it’s to get myself ahead in the world, and I have to do it, and the worst part involving being long-distance is almost over, but it still really bothers me sometimes. It sucks!!!!!
I suspect my SO is waiting until I’m done with classes to propose. Which makes getting through the rest of the semester even more aggravating, in a way, because once it ends– well, then I have to wonder if he’s talked to my parents so he can actually do it!
I make the waiting more frustrating for myself by checking out the “sold” section of two Etsy shops we’ve looked at for rings. I’m fairly sure he might get the ring from one of them, so I kind of stalk what they sell. I’m crazy!!! One of them sold an example of the ring design I had originally shown him, recently– but it’s a design that I stupidly told him I don’t like anymore! So it couldn’t be mine. . . blargh, I’m so impatient!
On a happy note, we were chatting about his cousin’s wedding, that’s coming up at the end of the month, and something dumb popped out of my mouth (breaking my Shut-it-Up Pact in the process). I said, “You know, I bet people there are going to bug us and say ‘you’re next!'” And what did my SO do? He gathered me up in his arms and said, “Well, we probably are!” *Swoon*
EEEEEEE!!!!! Where am I supposed to find the patience to deal with all this? I suppose I can substitute massive piles of school reading and thesis proposal revisions for patience. . .
Commiseration, anyone???!!! :O