(Closed) Next time you're at a party, do everyone a favor

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
461 posts
Helper bee

I usually start off with “Do you know who made this bangin’ bean dip?” or “sooo, how do you know so and so?”

 

Post # 3
Member
1408 posts
Bumble bee

Im an easy talker and ususally dont have a problem chatting it up with others.   But I like to also comment on something someone is wearing.. like Oh I love your dress where did you get it?

Post # 4
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I don’t think you’re crazy at all!!  This is one thing I cannot stand…my fiance’s brother is like this because he’s incredibly competitive with my fiance and always feels the need to point out to everyone all the ways he is better.  It drives me insane!!!  He always talks about himself and I don’t think I’ve EVER heard him take an interest in anything someone else had to say…much less ask someone a question about themselves.  It’s so rude!! 

Post # 6
Member
13624 posts
Honey Beekeeper

View original reply
zippy85:  You’re not crazy, and it sounds like you’re doing everything right. Unfortunately, some people really are that self centered and clueless. My only advice is not to get trapped indefinitely. Excuse yourself, say nice chatting with you, and make the rounds. 

Post # 8
Member
7440 posts
Busy Beekeeper

The best advice I have heard is “The most interesting person at the party is the one that let’s other people talk, people will not remember what you said but how you made them feel”

Post # 10
Member
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

I’ve been there, too.  I always end up knowing a lot more about other people.  But that’s okay with me.  I actually don’t care to share my life details with people that are unattached or unaffiliated with me (well, in person apparently, since I’m on here way too much! lol).  But anyway, you can always work in that information about yourself.  After they tell you something they do for fun, tell them that’s cool and what you do.  Sometimes it feels awkward to say “what about you?” after each time someone asks you a question…but if you go ahead and share a little, then they can ask follow up questions instead of feeling like they’re interviewing you back. 

Post # 11
Member
4113 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

View original reply
zippy85:  I find people unsufferably rude at parties too.. Most conversations I end up in involve someone shamlessly bragging for no good reason. So many people just seem annoyed that someone would dare to small talk them at a party.

I’m generally introverted but I do try to talk to new people in social situations because that’s what you do.. People need to listen more and talk about themselves way less. My ‘favorite’ is when the person all but cuts you off to say what they wanted to say, even if it has nothing to do with what you’re talking about.

Post # 13
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

View original reply
zippy85:  Honestly??  I handle it by avoiding him, and when we do have to spend time together, my fiance and I vent to each other about it afterwards.  My fiance is very considerate of other people, and so are his parents…it’s hard to believe these two even come from the same family.  I’m dreading having to listen to him talk about himself all night at OUR wedding in a couple of weeks…he’ll probably be comparing every detail of our wedding to his and point out all the ways his was better (at least in his mind)…uggggggggggghhhhhhh!!!

I’ll have to try your suggestion next time I really get fed up with him…I have a lot of other ideas but they’re not quite as nice, so I usually don’t really say anything.

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 1 month ago by shelbypoo.
Post # 15
Member
475 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I feel you!  I am a teacher so all day I’m asking students questions about anything and everything under the sun and obviously I know they are not going to reciprocate so it would be nice in social settings to have people ask me questions for once and be able to share a little about myself, but I think I have officially been labled in my social group as “the good listener”.  I definitely can get people talking, but getting them to shut up is tough!  I feel the same way leaving social events knowing a lot about other people, but barely able to get out what I do or what I think about the bean dip 🙂

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