- 6 years ago
- Wedding: August 2016
and ask other people about themselves.
I know I’m preaching to the choir here, as you are all upstanding, compassionate, kind, socially-aware human beings. So maybe you can just help me pass along this important service announcement to everyone else.
I often go to events and meet new people, and it’s amazing to me the basic things people fail to ask others:
1) How are you?
2) What brings you here?
3) Where are you from?
4) Are you in school? If so, what are you studying?
5) What do you do?
6) (More importantly) What do you do for fun?
7) Have you travelled anywhere? If so, where?
Any one of these questions is an appropriate conversation starter with virtually any stranger you meet at a party.
And if someone asks something like this to you, it’s appropriate and kind to reciprocate and ask them the question back to them.
I struggle at social events, not because I’m anxious or introverted, but because I find people to be overwhelmingly rude. I’ll make kind small talk with people only to be bombarded with selfish bragging and no reciprocation. They will ask my Fiance about himself, but will ignore me. I left an event this weekend knowing virtually everything about one couple we met, and they left literally knowing nothing about me.
People love to talk about themselves, and just as much as anyone else, I love to talk about me! But I’m polite and I’m not going to just randomly blurt out random facts if you fail to ask. It’s tactless and rude – but maybe not as rude as someone you’re at a social event with simply not seeming to give 2 sh*ts to make any conversation at all.
I know people aren’t intentionally being rude, that’s the thing. They’re just clueless. Totally ignorant. But that’s part of the problem.
Am I crazy? Does anyone know how else to handle this better so I don’t leave events feeling upset that everyone else was rude? I’m not unapproachable, I swear! 🙂