(Closed) NICE but SMALL weddings…

posted 8 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 33
Member
26 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I am also trying to throw a small but nice wedding and it is surprisingly difficult!  Each place I’ve seen with nice, small event rooms that would be perfect for a 30 person reception still have absolutely absurd minimums.  I couldn’t spend $12,000 on food and drinks for 30 people if I wanted to!

Post # 35
Member
224 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2015 - Powel Crosley Estate, Sarasota, FL

We just decided to plan the same type of wedding – we’re doing a Destination Wedding at a California Vineyard (still researching) and are planning on honeymooning immedately after in Napa. This type of intimate cermony is perfect for us 🙂

 

Post # 36
Member
395 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@Merinda1994:  Have you looked at intimateweddings.com?  They have lots of beautiful small weddings there.

Post # 37
Member
572 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Merinda1994:  Most “wedding-y” places are going to be set up for larger groups.  I’d look for some place that has an elopment package, or think outside the box with restaurants etc.

Post # 38
Member
539 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

We’re doing the same! We got engaged last month and are looking at houses and hope to get married in our new backyard with only close family and a few friends. We have a date set for 3/15/15 so hopefully we can make it work! 🙂

Post # 39
Member
874 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Merinda1994:  Nothing wrong with small weddings!!  10-15 people sounds perfect to me.  I too am having a small wedding.  Only 10 invited guests.

 

I am finding however, that it still doesn’t really matter how many people you invite.  Weddings are still just stupid expensive.  For our very small private Destination Wedding, I am looking at 15k.  Still a lot of money!

 

I say do what you like!  I think a small wedding can be just as classy as a large one, but where the small ones come out ahead is in intimacy.  My thought are I have invited 10 VERY LUCKY guests, to share our day with us.  I want everyone to feel involved and I think sometimes that is not possible with large weddings.

 

I have decided to go with the very minimum for vendors.  I have an officiant, florist, photographer, and hair and make up, and musicians.  I didn’t go for a typical venue.  I went with a lodge large enough to accomodate all guests for 3 nights.  And the ceremony and the dinner will be at the lodge.  I have not hired a planner, nor have I rented anything.  But even with skimping on things, I am still looking at 15k.

 

Shop around.  I saved over 1k on flowers by hiring a florist who works out of her home.  The gentleman who owns the lodge has forgone on the excess wedding fee to use his property because it is such a small party.  There are good deals out there, it just will require some digging on your part.

 

Good luck!!

ETA  Don’t accept the first number people throw at you.  Keep looking.  Planning a Destination Wedding has been exceptionally frustrating to say the very least!  And the beginning stages it is VERY overwhelming, just keep going.  It is worth it in the end!!  I am at the end of planning……and never been so happy to be done with all of it.

 

Post # 40
Member
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

We are going the same route!  At this rate, we’ve been to enough weddings to realize what we do and do not want.  I figure, if I’m going to spend a lot of money, I’d rather make sure the food and details are great—and I couldn’t do that if the guest list were bigger.  I also want the wedding to be full of people I truly know and care about (not parents’ friends, friends I hardly keep in touch with, guest’s dates).  It just seems like one big expensive obligation after a while.

I know SO many couples who say they are barely in touch with their own wedding party anymore and say that if they could do it again, they wouldn’t do a big wedding.

Post # 41
Member
239 posts
Helper bee

@Merinda1994: So glad I found this thread! We have having our immediately family. So including my FH and I, there will be 14 people. Like some PPs mentioned we are having to look a little harder to find places that will be willing to accommodate a group that small, but we are sticking to our guns on keeping it intimate and staying within budget (8k). We aren’t having the typical bells and whistles like music, cake cutting, dancing etc. because really, it’s just not that important to us.

As 

View original reply
@letigre mentioned, even though it’s small we want to have a beautiful event. We will have a fantastic photogpraher, a very nice meal, the rings that we really want and I might even bump up my dress budget (although I think it’s silly to spend a lot of money on a dress you will wear once). One thing to think about is your venue. Unless you hire a wedding planner/event coordinator, you will want to keep your ceremony pretty basic as far as decorations go. You don’t want your guests to be expected to set up/tear down your decorations while you’re off getting your photos taken.

 

Post # 42
Member
1311 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

@Merinda1994:  I wish we could have a small wedding (I hate being the center of attention), but Fiance isn’t entirely sold on the idea. He did agree that we can do everything we can to keep the guest list on the smaller side – for instance, our mock list at the moment has just under 70 people on it. It helps that we don’t really know too many people we would want to share our day with (and that there are family members we really don’t want to include or don’t know well enough to invite), but its still bigger than I would have originally wanted.

I would suggest that you and your Fiance write down the three most important things you both feel should be included in a wedding (for instance, good food, good photographer, and good drinks). Compare your lists and then compromise; for instance, pick one item you both agree is important and then you each pick one from your own list that you think is important. This is where you will splurge a bit on your budget.

And keep in mind the personalities of the guests you intend to invite. Do they really love to dance? If so, see about having music playing and room for dancing. Do they prefer to just sit around and talk with one another (like at a dinner party)? If so, then a big dance floor isn’t necesary and you should mostly stick to softer dinner music. Do they love board games? Then put some out on the tables and let them go crazy.

Other people can offer all the opinions they want, but if you and your Fiance are the ones paying for the wedding then those opinions don’t really count. Make sure that this is really what you want and then enjoy the process. Congratulations on your engagement!

 

Post # 43
Member
484 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Merinda1994:  I haven’t been to a wedding like that, but I think it sounds wonderful (:

Post # 44
Member
1275 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@Merinda1994:  I WISH this is what we could do. Good for you doing exactly what you want to do!!

Post # 45
Member
530 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Merinda1994:  we did this, but we did immediate family and a small bridal party made up of out every day friends that we see on a regulare basis, it ended up being 40 ppl since so many ofmy FI’s fmaily lives so close and we had unexpected people show up aswell. but it was nice, small, it was lovly i wouldnt have done it any other way.. maybe smaller if we could have done it without hurting anyones feelings ;p

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