Nightmare. Utter Living Nightmare.

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 91
Member
3560 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

SusieQAnon :  i’m a whistle blower..? perhaps you need to look up that term to understand it. also, i did say talk to a lawyer and social worker. and i said OP has options – unlike everyone else that was saying she MUST go to the police.

Post # 92
Member
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

catskillsinjune :  “so ask yourself – what is this really worth to you? i’d probably just count my blessings that i’m not with him anymore and try to move on. it sucks, absolutley. but you’re likely not going to get what you’re seeking from the police.” That’s what you wrote well before you told her to go to the police (after a dozen other bees had already said it), without writing a kind word to go with it. Whistleblower is the first word that came to mind but I guess I meant know-it-all. And I’m not derailing this thread any more so feel free to pm me if you want to continue to bicker.

Post # 93
Member
3560 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

SusieQAnon :  I never wanted to bicker. I was simply offering advice to OP. You’re the one who decided to call me out in your reply.

Also, I still never told her to go to the police (don’t know where you got that info). 

And offering a different view of what the realistic consequences are isn’t what I associate with “know-it-all”. But thanks for the name calling. 

Post # 94
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

Ask yourself one question: do I wish the woman (or women) he dated immediately before me had warned me about this before I got involved with him? If your answer is yes, you can help the future women in his life in a way that no one was able to do for you. Report him.

Post # 95
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

You should definitely call the police.  That is a complete and utter violation and you don’t want to find yourself (or someone else to find you) posted on some porn site.  At minimum, with an affidavit/complaint from you, the police will have probable cause to get a search warrant for all his computers and electronic devices to see if he still has copies of any of the files.  Even if you don’t pursue this criminally to the end (putting him in jail), during this process, you could most likely get a court order to force the files be deleted/destroyed and an order restraining him from ever disseminating or showing the videos of you.  If this guy tries to turn it into a “he-said, she-said” situation, I guaranty the situation will turn out a million times worse for him because other girls identified on the videos will press charges as well.  Expose this POS for who he is.

Post # 97
Member
1000 posts
Bumble bee

You’re not ruining his life by going to the police. He did that to himself.

Post # 98
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 1997

shellshock :  Two words: toxic narcissist. Been there, done that. Your man is a classic toxic narcissist. He’ll lie, cheat like mad, then tell you you’re either crazy or a prude for even bringing it up, plus he’ll tell you that it’s all your fault. Cut all ties. Run, do not walk, do not pass Go. Never speak to him again. I’m not kidding. Mine not only cheated on me constantly but told me that I was crazy, then beat my head on the bathroom floor because I “ruined” his afternoon by going to the movies alone when he was too busy having sex with another woman to get in the car. I was his patsy, his wallet, and his punching bag. He finally left town to leach off somebody else (and ruined their marriage), but he kept coming back for visits. The only way I got rid of mine for good was to get a great big boyfriend (now husband) who sat sharpening an enormous knife in front of him while he was begging me to let him stay over for a couple of days. That was the last I heard of him.

Post # 99
Member
205 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I haven’t read the whole thread but I think you should chat to a lawyer and get legal advice on what your next step should be. I personally think you should do that first before you do anything else. 

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