(Closed) No assigned seating??

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: What do you prefer?

    Assigned seats

    Pick your own seats (with reserved tables for family)

    Not a big deal/ no preference

  • Post # 2
    Member
    9439 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2016

    We didn’t do assigned seating beyond a three tables reserved for my parents, his parents, and the wedding party. Our guestlist was small (60 people), there wasn’t anyone who didn’t know at least half the guests there, and there were plenty of extra seats so people could sit with who they wanted. It worked out great. Everyone ended up sitting at a table I probably would have sat them with if we had done a seating chart.

    I’ve also been to a couple of weddings with no seating chart and it’s never been a problem.

    Post # 3
    Member
    30393 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    View original reply
    emsie :  The downside of not assigning seating is the confusion and delay it causes for your guests. People don’t always seat themselves logically. They will leave two single empty seats across the table from one another. A family of 4 will only be able to find two seats empty together at one table and two at another.

    Post # 4
    Member
    2979 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

    You need to include a shit load more tables/chairs if doing not assigned. People will leave random seats and it wont fit ‘perfectly’.

    I’d just do assigned tables and get on with it.

    Post # 5
    Member
    184 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    I agree with @jules1949 about the confusion/delay in getting guests to sit. I was guest in a small 40-guest wedding with no assigned seating. The delay was caused by “groups” of friends and family wanting their own table, trying to “save seats” by splaying their jackets and purses around, etc. It was a bit annoying to be honest, but it’s not the end of the world. We had assigned tables for our own wedding.

    I’m curious and a bit confused: how will your # of guests with no assigned seating equate to smaller portions? No matter what, you’ll have XX of guests…meaning XX portions to serve. If you have assigned tables, you can still serve the “small” portions the venue coordinator mentioned.

    Post # 6
    Member
    3848 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    View original reply
    emsie :  We did assigned seating, but once people were through eating they moved around, which was nice.  

    Post # 8
    Member
    1156 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    We had 40 at our wedding and assigned tables. It wasn’t hard and I prefer assigned seats. I was at a wedding once where I sat in the back with the brides grandparents b/c they didn’t get their early enough to get a prime table at the front. Other people have raised excellent points as to why this doesn’t work. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    1416 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2016

    We’re not assigning seats but we are assigning tables 

    Post # 10
    Member
    184 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    View original reply
    emsie :  Ah, gotcha. Thank you. I think assigned seating and entree option are mutually exclusive. You can still assign your guests a table to sit at (if you wish), and still serve the smaller chicken & fish combo plate. You won’t need to ask for entree preference in your invitations.

    Or like you said in your original post, you can reserve a few tables for immediate family, and let others decide! 🙂 We’re all grownups.

    Btw, if I were a guest at your wedding, I’d love to have both options! Yum!

    Post # 11
    Member
    2957 posts
    Sugar bee

    If you do a free for fall, please have way more tables and chairs then there are people. Otherwise, the last 2 people in line (a couple, probably), will have to split up and sit with randos.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1917 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Not having assigned seating is the worst. So much confusion and issues. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    5985 posts
    Bee Keeper

    View original reply
    emsie :  My Brother-In-Law didn’t do it and it was great!  The only assigned seating was his chair and his wife’s chair.

    Post # 14
    Member
    3046 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

    At the very least please assign tables. In my experience not assigning tables or seating only works with small gatherings where majority of the guests are already familiar with each other. julies1949 and scissorgirl are spot on.

    Post # 15
    Member
    7964 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    If you don’t at least assign a table you will, as PPs have stated, have to provide at least 20% more seating. That means more centerpieces, more table linens, more chairs if you are renting those…and you’ll likely end up with some ten tops that have six people at them, some with eight, and some groups you’d probably put together split up.

    Even having just table assignments also avoids mishaps such as your former Peace Corps college roommate who works for Planned Parenthood stuck sitting next to your ultra-conservative, Trump-loving Aunt Mary. 

    The topic ‘No assigned seating??’ is closed to new replies.

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