(Closed) No Bachelor party for a Groom that deserves it :(

posted 4 years ago in Parties
Post # 2
Member
1017 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Could you maybe have a joint party?  I don’t remember what they are called, but my friend recently had one and it was great because everyone got to celebrate even though the amount of friends one of them has outnumbered the other

Post # 3
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee

I wouldn’t make it a grooms day, but I would just plan a nice day out for the both of you.  It may be nice to get away from all the wedding planning and any last minute stuff for a day.

A bach party is not a requirement.  So if he doesn’t get one it really isn’t the end of the world, and it certainly doesn’t make anyone selfish if they don’t want to throw him one.

But I think you need to clam down because to be in tears over this is a bit much.

Post # 6
Member
2969 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

bridalruss87:  that’s so sad he really has NO friends he could do something with and spend time with even if you plan it? Maybe you could plan something that he would like or enjoy and then plan with his friends to show up to it?

Post # 7
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee

bridalruss87:  But no one is required to throw him a party.  They obviously don’t want to throw him one so that is that.  And sorry but just because someone is getting married doesn’t mean that people are going to change and are willing to put differences aside.

Does it suck for him?  Sure.  But it is what it is, so time to move on.

Post # 8
Member
774 posts
Busy bee

bridalruss87:  My dad, my brother, DH’s dad took my Darling Husband to a real fancy steak dinner for his “bachelor party.” We held it the night before the wedding, and Darling Husband just let all the male wedding guests know when and where, and a bunch of guys ended up going. They were not necessarily his “best friends” or the people you would invite to a vegas trip or something, but they did include a lot of the male spouses, DH’s dad’s friends, the pastor marrying us, men on my side of the family, etc. which was just enough people to make Darling Husband feel special and have some entertaining guy-only convo before he got married.

Simple, but effective. I suggest you orchestrate something like this for your man. It does not need to be a formal event and it is okay if you help. If your dad already offered a nice dinner for him, take him up on that, and make sure all the other men are invited regardless of whatever internal BS you say they have going on. People change their minds, especially when they just have to show up and not plan something.

Post # 9
Member
1624 posts
Bumble bee

bridalruss87:  Isn’t the point of a bachelor party to hang out with his male friends before a man gets married? If your Fiance doesn’t have any male secular friends, then I think he could skip having a bachelor party, no? If your Fiance is as wonderful and amazing as you say he is, it is a little surprising that he doesn’t have friends or relatives who think as highly as you do and want to take him out to celebrate. 

As PP stated, bachelor parties are not a requirement. Being a nice person really has nothing to do with having a bachelor party- there are plenty of very kind single people who never get bachelor/ette parties, showers, etc. and they are also deserving of parties- you don’t hear any of them complaining that no one thought to give them gifts and parties. Likewise, I know several reprehensible boys who had multiple and lavish bachelor parties. 

Post # 10
Member
1936 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I’m genuinely sad your Fiance doesn’t get a party. I know what you mean: it’s not about the party itself, it’s about what he deserves and it sounds like he deserves more than he’s getting. It’s not usually the nice and thoughful people who have a plethora of people who want to throw them a party. That usually gets gifted to the fun guy, the crazy girl, etc. But the nice guy? He gets the even nicer wife, ;).

My Fiance has the opposite problem in that he has a line up of single guys who will take him anywhere he pleases for his bachelor party, but he’s over that lifestyle. 

He may not be as down about this as you are. Try not to focus on it, for his sake and just plan something for you two,

Post # 11
Member
1309 posts
Bumble bee

What’s a secular friend?

Post # 15
Member
1724 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

bridalruss87: You can still have a joint party of sorts, but let everyone you invite know HE’S the person of honor for this.

The topic ‘No Bachelor party for a Groom that deserves it :(’ is closed to new replies.

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