(Closed) No dancing… A dilemma?

posted 10 years ago in Reception
  • poll: Would it be a horrible wedding without dancing?

    Yes, You have to have dancing... that's what makes a wedding.

    No, Your wedding will be just fine.

  • Post # 3
    2025 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    @FallBride100811: I’m not kidding; I JUST had this conversation with Fi.  We are not having dancing at our wedding because the venue (a gorgeous state park on the Potomac River) was so important to me.  We’re doing an outdoor ceremony, then a BBQ lunch, and various lawn games will be available for people who want to stay around.  I anticipate the whole thing lasting about 3 hours, which is just fine with me!

    Post # 4
    2294 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    We chose not to have dancing and it was no issue at all.  None of my guests commented on it or seemed to miss it at all.  We did do a first dance and a father/daughter dance, but that was all.

    My husband and I don’t dance and we really wanted to just enjoy our guests and not have to compete with loud music to talk to them.

    Post # 5
    3214 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    We had our wedding at my mom and stepdad’s home, and there was no room for dancing. My Fiance and I aren’t dancers and neither are our parents. I was so worried about it. But you know what? It was AWESOME. People ate, drank, mingled, talked, and laughed all night. No one complained. There might have been some people who missed it, but if so, they kept their mouths shut. 🙂  Fun times:



    Post # 6
    1722 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2011

    We didn’t have dancing and it was absolutely fine.  Everyone had a wonderful time socializing and spending time with each other.  We don’t really dance a lot and most of our families don’t either.  All we did were toasts, cake cutting, and a guest book along with dinner and a short cocktail hour.  It still lasted almost four hours and everyone had a blast!

    Post # 7
    5166 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    It really depends on your guests, the dancing and music keeps people entertained and gives them break from toasts and speeches etc. If you dont want to have dancing will there be anything else going on?

    Post # 8
    646 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I do think you need to make sure there is something else to do if there is no dancing. I went to a wedding this past weekend where there was no dancing, and while it was nice, we all got bored after a while just sitting there staring at each other. So at least have some games or something or keep it short.

    If Fiance or some other guests like to dance consider having an after party at a local club or lounge. Keep it casual and just invite those who want to party to join you there. Guests will pay their own cover and buy their own drinks, and you dont have to rent a seperate space for dancing or hire a DJ.

    Post # 9
    5191 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    Our “reception” is more like a dinner party than anything. While I do plan to steal my Dad for an unofficial father-daughter dance during cocktail hour, there won’t be an official dance portion of the evening. Here’s our schedule:

    5pm- ceremony

    5:45-6:45pm- cocktail hour

    6:45-9:00pm- 4 course sit down dinner with wine and beer pairings for each course

    9:00-9:30pm- scotch and a cigar bar for the guys, dessert martinis for the ladies. people may decide to have a lil dance with their honey at this point, but it would be an impropmtu thing.

    9:45pm- We wrap up the evening, exhausted and happy. See everyone at breakfast tomorrow!

    Post # 10
    240 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I’ll be honest.. I LOVE to dance at weddings.  It’s the only time you get to dance as an adult really.  It’s like prom for grown ups.  I would get bored making small talk at my table for hours.  If you don’t think your guests will be bored, then go for it though.  It’s your wedding.

    Post # 11
    19 posts
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Here’s my advice – after party! just plan an after party with dancing at a restaurant, or a big enough place that can accomodate you! even someone’s house. not everyone would go anyway, and it would select out those who don’t care about dancing.

    that being said, your wedding will be beautiful and radiant no matter what. no dancing is no big deal, especially if it’s not that important to you.

    Post # 12
    315 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    We are not having dancing at our wedding either. It is going to be a simple cocktail and hors d’oeuvre reception and I think it will be just fine.  We will have music playing in the background.  It won’t last exceptionally long though so guests don’t get too bored.

    Post # 13
    861 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    Our venue doesn’t allow alcohol OR dancing. It’s a private University, so obviously no alcoholic beverages (we aren’t drinkers anywways; some of our guests have some issues with alcohol abuse, so we wouldn’t want to offer an opportunity to stumble).

    For some reason, the venue doesn’t allow dancing (it’s a Baptist University, so for traditonal reasons they don’t allow it). I was kind of sad at first because both our venues on campus are everything we want and need. I hope they let us have at least a first dance for a minute or two…there’s no crime in that, right? 😉 But, it won’t kill us. But hey, we can always have an intimate dance in our honeymoon suite! Our wedding guests will be an older crowd and most of them aren’t the dancing type anyway. The fiance and I don’t dance, but we want to learn how to someday…

    I think it will be a very fun, full of conversation, cozy, intimate setting for guests to sit at a candlelit dinner and dessert while romantic 1920-1940’s music plays in the background. PLUS, my fiance’s father doesn’t like to dance. My future mother-in-law does–so he was happy 🙂 Haha!

    I think your wedding is going to be a blast, and very relaxing for guests to enjoy their meals and talk.

    Post # 15
    2492 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Folks have weddings all the time with no dancing and guests have a great time. If there is no dancing, they will mingle, which people love to do anyway. I don’t see that there will be any problems at all.

    Guests generally don’t care for games or other forced entertainment.

    Post # 16
    2268 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I agree with PP’s that it depends on you and your guests. If you’re 21, met your Fiance at a club, have a huge Italian family, and are a dance teacher—not having dancing would be crazy weird.

    If you’re older, if your venue doesn’t really allow for it space wise, if you don’t like to dance, if your family and friends aren’t big into dancing. It won’t be missed.

    We did not have dancing at our wedding and I certainly didn’t miss it. Bear in mind that without dancing your wedding is probably going to be shorter just because the party atmosphere is going to be different. Not a single person even mentioned dancing (not even our families while we were planning, lol). We just aren’t really dancers….

    EDIT: saw your question about games. The shoe game is fun (look it up, it’s simple). We did a sort of Trivial pursuit game at our wedding, it was fun :). You could have a fauxtobooth–we just bought some silly hats, glasses, boas, etc and hung up a curtain. It was a blast! There are also some cute games for the guests at each table to get to know each other if you’re doing assigned seats. There are some great thread here on WB about games.

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