(Closed) No engagementbut we are choosing a wedding date….WTF?!

posted 11 years ago in Waiting
Post # 17
Member
918 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

That’s we are doing!  We’re looking at venues, etc.  We’re for all purposes engaged, but its a money thing and he is saving the last bits for the ring right now.

Post # 19
Member
5092 posts
Bee Keeper

In General: 

Idea of budget/General idea of guest list & # of guests

Venue/Church/Caterer/Food

Photographer/Officiant/Gown/Music

Cake, Invitations, etc.

Rings, Decor

Jewelry/Undergarments/Tux/Suit

Any other incidentals

I did my wedding within 4 months.

My daughters- 2 months +/_

 

Post # 21
Member
820 posts
Busy bee

Yay!  Your SO seems to be on board with the planning!  That’s HUGE (IMO)! 

It also sounds like he’s pretty easy going. 

I also commented on another thread of yours regarding things you could possibly start planning.  I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man last year and helped my friend plan.  Those were just a few things that came to mind.  🙂

Post # 22
Member
820 posts
Busy bee

Also, my friend had a book with a check list of things.  It was more of a work book/ guide book, but I don’t remember the name of it. 

It was quite comical as she got engaged 5-6 months before the wedding and the book suggested dress shopping about 9 months before!  When we were doing some planning over lunch, she flipped to that page and giggled.  No worries though. . .she found her dress and had plenty to have the alterations done.

Post # 23
Member
528 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

We picked the date before we were officially engaged as well! 🙂 We are getting maried October 8th (great date!).  🙂

We also were engaged before we had the ring as well.  My ring was kind of a process since we ordered the setting from Ireland and then had the diamond set here.  It worked for us, but we did get some comments from people who thought it was “weird.”

Post # 25
Member
435 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

oh lord I’ve been doing this too… makes me feel much better to know I’m not the only one! The ring is in the works, but I’ve been ready to get married for 2 years now and I’m so impatient to get this show on the road!

Post # 26
Member
82 posts
Worker bee

You guys have no idea how good it makes me feel to hear that other women are doing this too.  My “fiance” and I are unoficially engaged and he will be proposing to me sometime in July (he told me).  We’ve booked most of the big things (both venues, officiant, photographer, caterer–reception is at a restaurant, DJ and hair/makeup)  

I see nothing wrong with doing this, this way we guarantee we get the vendors we want 9 months ahead of time.  I’m totally happy doing this and can’t wait to walk down the aisle and marry my man! 

Post # 27
Member
107 posts
Blushing bee

Same thing as me…I’m spending hours everyday searching for venues, getting ideas etc but until I get the “sparkly thingy” (which im expecting in september) I can’t make any official bookings or buy anything. People around me know im getting married next January or February but its a really awakward situation to be in….like HURRY UP ALREADY WITH THE RING! ARRGH LOL

Post # 28
Member
569 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@eebgniddew: I know how you feel.  As far as “dates”, I gave BF a few month/year combos I was thinking about, as well as several good reasons for needing at least a year to plan in hopes that it will give him a good kick in the pants.  But I refuse to plan without a ring (not because I need a shiny or anything, I actually don’t care, but him giving me the ring = “you can tell your family now”, and I’d really like to be able to do that first!)

Post # 29
Member
57 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Same thing is happening with me!  I’m glad to see that there are others out there like this.  My bf and I had a discussion the other day about my concern about not being engaged yet, and my fear that by the time we do get engaged, the chapel will be booked up.  SO, we contacted the chapel and reserved a date for next May without putting money down, and are going to see it in a few weeks and to make the deposit!  Craziness!  But I’m so happy we are on the same page and it definitely helps to calm my anxiety about having to wait for him to propose.

Post # 30
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee

everyone is different, but I personally would not plan anything without an official engagement.

i think it would make me too angry!  but that’s just me.

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