(Closed) No father

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
3163 posts
Sugar bee

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ariannejuarbe:  I don’t have a Dad either but I have completely made peace with it and never think of it. Can I please offer you some advice? My Mum raised me as an amazing single Mum. She passed away 18 months ago and was sick for a long time. I used to feel sad thinking about what I didn’t have – a well Mum. What I wouldn’t give now to have my sick Mumma at my wedding. My advice is to value what you do have; your Mum and your Grandmother, and to include them in your day. The best thing about the times we live in is we no longer have to be traded by a patriarch for a herd of goats so the walk down the aisle and first dance doesn’t have to be with a man “just because”. 

Good luck with your wedding planning !

Post # 3
Member
9519 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

The person walking you down the aisle doesn’t have to be male. if you want your mother and grandmother to walk you down then do that. Or have your mother walk you down, and give your grandmother a kiss on the cheek at the first row of the aisle. Same with your dance, if that if what you want then dance with your mother. 

Post # 4
Member
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: Garden

I’m going to have my mom walk me down the isle. I hadn’t thought about father daughter dance yet, but probaly something similar. My dad left when I was 7, and while he’ll probably be there, I don’t want the man who abandoned us to have such a significant role.

Post # 8
Member
3163 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
ariannejuarbe:  Thank you. I’m getting there. I’m glad my story helped a little. I’m sure your wedding will be amazing whatever you decide. 

Post # 9
Member
271 posts
Helper bee

I’m having to think the same problem. 

 

Dad passed when I was 14 and I don’t have anyone I am as close to than my dad or my grandma (passed when I was 16). I don’t know who to ask to walk me down the aisle. I love my mum but my relationship with my dad and my grandma was a whole different level. 

 

Post # 10
Member
4111 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

My dad left when I was 3. Didn’t see or talk to him after that. 

My mom walked me down the aisle which was awesome. We didn’t do father/daughter or mother/son dance because we didn’t want to

Post # 11
Member
1119 posts
Bumble bee

I cut off contact with my Dad 8 years ago and haven’t seen him since. We do text occasionally though.

He will not be invited to the wedding. My Mum will be walking me down the aisle which I’m really excited about it, as are others. And my Uncle will do a speech in place of ‘father of the bride speech’. My Mum was afraid to do a speech so I asked my Uncle whom I’m close with and loves public speaking. In UK we don’t do father&daughter dances so I didnt think about that..I would say either dance with your Mum or skip that part and just dance with your new husband.

It got me down too at the start of planning, I guess it was a reminder that I only have one parent. However I’m now feeling better about it and actually quite excited about the fact that our wedding will be different to others in these ways.

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