(Closed) No Gift… or Card

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I think you just need to let it go.  I had a few family members who never acknowledged my wedding either (including a cousin who is only a year older than I am).  There really isn’t anything you can say to them without sounding petty and like you are after a present or compliments.

Post # 4
Member
1246 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

i say drop it…its been a while now..

Post # 5
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

It’s been 9 months. Gotta let it go!

Post # 6
Member
2475 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would be angry too.  I think it’s rude to not at the very least give a card.  I wouldn’t bother saying anything, I don’t really think it’s something you should confront someone about.  Just try to let it go and chalk it up to people having poor manners.

Post # 7
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

i’m going through the same thing… no gift or card from family (who i’m sure has some money because my dad just loaned them a bunch for no real reason).

on the outside, i’m letting it go. i’ll be nice to them when i see them. on the inside, it will take a little longer to forgive.

Post # 8
Member
4465 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

It’s definitely rude, but time to let it go.

Post # 9
Member
944 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I agree with MissAsB—unfortunately, there’s not really anything you can do because if you did ask for even a card it would look strange—even though their behavior is also strange to me. 

Really, etiquette (which I don’t always agree with but I do in this case) says a guest attending a wedding does not technically have to give you a gift but it is appreciated and a nice thing to do since it’s a big moment in your lives and a celebratory event like birthdays.  A friend of mine always says she gives a gift large enough to cover the cost of the meal she is given at the wedding–nice thought!  I think if anything they could have managed a card!  Personally, even if I can’t go to a wedding I like to send a gift because, well, I love to give gifts.  Some people are just odd and I would just pack it up and let it go because if you don’t, it will look like you are being a gift grabber.  As for the whole family not getting you a gift–in that group of people–maybe someone else in the family thought a gift was given?  Probably not, but that’s the only explaination I can think of.

 

Post # 10
Member
4159 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Yeah, I agree with the others, unfortunately there isn’t much you can do about it now.  It definitely sucks and it would be interesting to hear their reasoning, but you’ll have to let it go.  Sorry to hear that happened!

Post # 11
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I get why you’re upset but I agree, you have to try to get past it.  I think its so wrong of anyone, especially a family member to not at least send a card, but I guess you can’t expect everyone to understand.

Post # 12
Member
257 posts
Helper bee

its time to let go.

Post # 13
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

It does stink that they didn’t give a simple best of luck, but some people just get so wound up in their lives they forget these things.

Like the other’s said just let it go

Post # 15
Member
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

@hedgehog – your family sound like a bunch of mean little moochers! send all the gifts you’d buy them to charity or someone that you know would appreciate them. 

Post # 16
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I agree it’s gotta be irritating. But as far as should you say anything? absolutly not. It’s equally rude to ask about it or confront them about it. I’d say just let it go; & when weddings for their kids come around; remember that you only NEED to give a card. Because that is what you are saying you think they @ least could have done. As for excuses; The only thing i can think of is that the kids assumed that their MOM (your aunt) would have covered the gift. (I know my mom does that sometimes enless I tell her we’ve covered it) I say forget it & just re-evaluate your gift giving for their family if you feel the need to.

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