- 5 years ago
- Wedding: August 2013
How do you interpret this?
How do you interpret this?
@WestCoast: Eevry wedding I have been to where they have said no gifts, they usually offer a charity/organization to donate to. Nothing at all is out of the ordinary for them to do, but eh. to each their own. Dont get them a present, you may make them angry. Get them a card if you feel like you need/ cant go without getting them something.
I take that it means that the couple would prefer no gifts. However it would depend on the wedding situation on whether or not I would still give a cash gift. If it was an expensive Destination Wedding for me as a guest then I would probably skip a gift or give a small gift card/money. If it was an in town wedding I would gift cash as normal in my card.
I would also interpret it as no gifts at all. I might bring a bottle of wine or something like I would if a friend was hosting a dinner party, and a card for sure, but nothing else.
In my area, it’s almost a given that guests give a gift of ~$100 per person, so I interpret “no gifts please” to mean that a card and a cash gift..
I’d probably be confused too. I’d think it literally means they just want people to bring them cards. If they’re really just meaning no “boxed” gifts, as in “bring us cash” I think they may have shot themselves in the foot.
I would respect the couple and not give a gift but would send them a thank you card after attending their wedding.
We dont want gifts either and that includes everything cards, money, or gifts. We just prefer to buy what we want and not have to worry about returning or receiving anythingwe dont want.
We just want our guest to come and celebrate our day with us.
Etiquette Snob here…
Well technically, IF someone was to actually put that on their Invitation then it would be a breach of Etiquette… because the rule is “one shall not mention gifts at all” (even to say NONE)
On the otherhand, if I was to hear thru word of mouth, the grapevine that a Bride & Groom didn’t register for anything, wish for anything, or expect anything…
As I am a “gracious” person for their hospitality… I’d still bring along (or send) a token of appreciation for being remembered / thought of when they were compiling their invite list.
A Bottle of Wine would be appropriate… as would be a gift of money (or a Gift Card) if I SO WISHED to do so.
Hope this helps,
*Our own Wedding as Encores Mr TTR and I didn’t register anywhere. We didn’t talk gifts at all… except for perhaps 1 or 2 occasions when someone enquired as to our wishes… when we used the appropriate “Honestly your presence is present enough”…. in the end many of our Guests gave us a gift of wine (not a far reach as it is well known amongst our friends that we are Food & Wine Lovers)… and other friends gave us either Gift Cards (Visa, one for a Restaurant and another for the LCBO ~ Liquor Store) OR plain old Money (CASH came from family members)
All was deeply appreciated !!
Lol, and a “perfect fit”.
I always hate this. I read it as literally NO GIFTS. I consider cash/check a gift, so when you say no gifts, to me, that includes money. It’s so hard for guests because we feel guilty NOT getting you something (I’m using YOU in a general sense), but if we do, or if we think you mean money, then we risk offending you buy ignoring your requests. It’s a toughie…
@WestCoast: Hmmm…I try hard to respect people’s wishes when it comes to stuff like gifts. So if they said they didn’t want any I’d just get them a card and write a personal congratulations message inside. That said, I’d probably feel a little guilty and uncomfortable showing up with nothing.
I’m fine with people asking for money (but I like to know what it’s going towards-like their honeymoon) or charitable donations. I will provide what’s written on the website or whatever. But please don’t expect me to read multiple layers into the phrase ‘no gifts please’. Because I’m not doing it.
I’d be confused as to whether they really wanted NOTHING or if that meant they want cash only.. hmmm.
I’d give money, unless they stated specific charities I should donate to instead.
I think people always like to get money – if they’ve been living together, or if they just don;t need anything, then they might say no gifts. But in reality, everyone can do with a bit of cash, to put towards their honeymoon, upgrading something in their home, etc… I’d never show up at a wedding emptu-handed, and if they’re not registered anywhere, I’ll bring cash in a card.
What it literally means is no gift – no present, no money, but maybe a card. I think what a lot (not everyone, of course) of people HOPE for when they say “no gifts” is that they will receive cash instead.
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