Post # 1
Well With this great economy and the wonderful world of construction slowing down. And the expense of paying for our own wedding. We have decided since you are debt free and would like to keep it that way that there is no room in the budget for a honeymoon 🙁 I know it is killing him because he feels like he should be able to provide better and with work being so slow this just adds to the frustration because he really wanted to take me somewhere special.
At first I didn’t mind I thought we will just hide out at home and not tell anyone where we are going..No biggy . But with only three weeks to the wedding I have been getting question after question as to where we are going..I don’t feel like telling people..Hey we can’t afford one! So I have been just saying that what we are doing is not set in stone yet. Every time someone asks it makes me feel very sad and disappointed that we can’t go anywhere .. We are both virgins and this will be the first time that we are able to spend time alone without a chaperone.
I don’t want to just be home! Tons of my family will be in town and I just want to get away from everyone and not be bothered!!! I have not told him this because I know it would make him feel even worse about the situation then he already does he is an amazing man and a very hard worker I feel like spoiled brat for feeling like this …….ughhhhh I HATE MONEY!!!
Post # 3
I’m sorry you are so upset. Honestly, my husband and I didn’t go on a honeymoon until last week (basically a first anniversary trip). It’s tough when you can’t afford it but you don’t want to go to debt over a vacation (even your honeymoon).
Post # 4
I am so sorry to hear that….we too are paying for the whole wedding ourselves and had no $$ left in our budget for a honeymoon however, I was lucky enough to have won a Hawaii Honeymoon trip at a bridal show I attended. It was the Grand prize of the day. But, we did plan on registering at Honeymoon.com in lieu of the standard wedding registries. I know it is too late for you to have done that with your wedding just weeks away.
But who knows, maybe you will get some cash $$ for your wedding and you could go away….even if it isn’t for weeks to a lavish exotic place…but just a cozy lil get away which can still be just as lovely and romantic. Good Luck!
Post # 5
We didn’t go on an honeymoon either because it didn’t work for our schedule. Like MissAB we will likely take a nice vacation around our 1st anniversary. Just tell people you have decided to put it off for a while, that’s all they need to know. Is there a nice destination town any where near you where you could just head out for a couple of nights and stay at a cheap B&B so you have some time to relax with just the two of you.. but not break the bank?
Post # 6
I had the same idea as Moose. Is there somewhere near your hometown where you get a hotel for a weekend, have nice dinners out, etc.?
Post # 7
I’m sorry you’re feeling this way! I can somewhat relate as I just lost my job and if we hadn’t already paid for our honeymoon we might not be going on one. You should book a night or two at a hotel or a B&B like another poster suggested. That way you’re not spending a ton of money but you can still have your privacy. Then later on, when things are less tight, you guys can book a nice vacation!
Post # 8
with Future Mrs.I on this one, maybe after gathering your $$ from the wedding, you may be able to just hop in the car and rive down to Florida or to California to have a little mini Honeymoon that way to enjoy yourself. In fact, thats what you can tell everyone, “we’re going to hop in the car and see where the road takes us…”
Post # 9
I’m so sorry – I can’t imagine – I told my Fiance that the honeymoon is non-negotiable; I’d get married at the courthouse if we had to! I’m paying for my wedding too and I know how hard it is and even though the wedding memories will be amazing, that you just want some alone time with your hubby too.
I did a search and found this website that has some good ideas on how to honeymoon at home:
Just because you’re at home doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy your first few days together. Stock the house with all the necessities and turn your phones and computers off. Forget the world and just enjoy being newlyweds and your alone time with each other. Break out the champagne!!! You’re just married and that is cause for celebration!
*hugs* I know it’s hard but I hope you like some of these ideas and then maybe you can take a fabulous vacation on your first anniversary
Post # 10
I love MrsH1010’s idea. Maybe some guests will give you cash gifts, and you could put it towards a minimoon-style honeymoon. Take a trip to a lakeside cabin or go on hotwire.com to book a hotel for a few nights. You could even go camping (note: I’m basing these ideas off of your MN location 🙂
Sounds like you and your husband would have a great time just being together. I’m trying to convince my husband to take a smaller scale honeymoon so that we actually go (see my “are we going on a honeymoon” post). I think you have the right idea with focusing on being away together. good luck!
Post # 11
We are doing a mini honeymoon after our wedding. We are going to Vegas for 4 days. Flights and hotel rooms are crazy cheap and alot of the hotels will throw in show tickets and stuff if you stay an extra night.
We are paying for most of the wedding ourselves but we opted to do a honeymoon registry to help pay for our trip to England on our 1st year anniversary.
Post # 12
As much as this situation sucks you are not in this boat alone. I would tell people too, there is no problem with that!
MY fiance and i cant afford it either, it says right on our wedding website that we will be going on our honeymoon for our one year anniversary, to Greece in July of 2011.
Who knows!!1 If people know you can afford it maybe they will pitch in a get a hotel room for two nights or something 🙂
Post # 13
We also have no plans to go on a real honeymoon. But we have decided to stay at a B&B for a few nights. I am sure you can work out some mini-honeymoon nearby whether it be at a B&B, rental or camping. It may not be what you have in mind, but as virgin newlyweds–you probably will not be leaving the bedroom much anyway 😉 I say definitly do something (camping is only $20 a night max usually) and save the big honeymoon trip for your one year anniversary. A lot of people do this anyway.
Post # 14
Is there anyway you can do a mini-moon in your hometown? My hubby and I had to do that and ended up having a blast. We stayed 2 nights at a nice hotel downtown and then went out to a nice restaurant. I had re-decorated the bedroom in our apartment to surprise him so it felt “new” for the few days I could take off of work.
We’re going on a honeymoon close to our 1 year anniversary. So, maybe you guys could save for that?
Post # 15
@ qui40067 Thanks for that link… It had some good Ideas , I really liked the one about our first date..I think I will suprise him with that one…it was always his favorite place to go and it is about an hour away from where we live..maybe we could get a room while we are down there??
@Baileyh Thanks for making me not feel like I am alone!
@cherryblossom80 I am sure you are right about not leaving the room ..lol…
As far as stayin gin our home town that problem I live in a very small town and I really don’t feel like running into anyone I know and since my large (and loud Italian/German) family will all be staying in the same town and site seeing I am sure that we would run into someone.
ANy one have anymore ideas??
Post # 16
Its really important to have a honeymoon. It can be anything, but go somewhere. Most people regret not going & you’ll have fun memories just the two of you in a new place.
My suggestion is that you plan to stay at your house for your wedding night. You can open up your gifts & cards & with your wedding money, go on a trip. You can go to priceline.com & bid on a hotel (go to a place neither of you has been before) & you can get a really good deal there, but you have to book it a day before you go. Let people know you’re on your honeymoon too, when you go to check in. I got a decent hotel for our wedding night & they upgraded us to an amazing suite that was a free upgrade! You’d be suprised at what people do, but don’t expect it cause they may not have anything open & some places don’t do that. Even if its just for 1 night. Bring a camera & just have fun :).
If you really can’t afford anything in cash, it will be worth it if you go into a little debt as long as you’re able to pay it off! It sounds like you’re already very sad just because people are talking about it & you don’t think you get one. But really, talk this over with your Fiance. I know you don’t want him to feel bad, however concealing this from him may lead to resentment later, or for him to feel worse that you didn’t let him know. Maybe he thinks you’re completely fine without having one… talk things over with him tonight & come up with minihoneymoon solutions. Even take a camping trip so you don’t have to pay for a hotel.