(Closed) No kids at my wedding….is that bad?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Nope, the only kids at my wedding were my daughter (flowegirl) and nephew (ringbearer). If we would have let friends and cousins bring kids, we would have been at about 30 extra plates, and that wasn’t in our budget. I think 3 friends brought their babies, but they were like 6months and younger, and didn’t cost us any extra money.

Post # 4
Hostess
16195 posts
Honey Beekeeper

Lots of ladies here didn’t invite kids for lots of different reasons. I didn’t invite children to our wedding. A few of our guests chose not to attend for that reason, but the majority of those with children found child care for the evening and spent the night celebrating with us!

Post # 5
Member
304 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2022

its absolutely OK! I will not be having children at my wedding (exceptions – flower girl and ring bearer) but No one else. Ive been to a few weddings with children and they just run around and the parents dont seem to be having as much fun! I also read in a few places that if you choose to not have children at your wedding that you should , hire a babysitter to sit with the kids in another room, but thatd Def not in the budget. Most will understand your request so no worries

Post # 6
Member
2142 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Nope, you & FI’s wedding, the choice is up to you two.

FWIW, before this turns into a bashing kids at wedding thread.

We had a TON of kids at our wedding. And it was the most fun ever! But kids in our family are quite well behaved. They were out on the dance floor first and off last. The parents were having a blast dancing with them. There was a baby crying for 5 seconds at the ceremony I could care less.

Never even heard of people hiring babysitters for weddings till WB.

For us having kids at wedding was a top priority so we cut elsewhere to make that happen. Everyone has different priorities.

Post # 7
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Actually it’s perfectly normal, it’s your wedding, if you don’t want children running around and want a more grown up affair the thats fine. Personally if I had children and my friend invited me to a wedding but didn’t want children to attend, I would be perfectly fine with that, as I would respect her wishes about who she wanted around her.

Besides, one evening out without the kids, I bet most parents would leap for the chance..

Post # 8
Member
649 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

It’s perfectly fine not to invite children.  It’s your event and you a footing the bill, therefore it’s fine to make whatever choices you want.  Plus alot of times it give parents an excuse to get a sitter and have a night out with adults!

Post # 9
Member
10287 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting an adults only wedding. We had one, with the exception of our first cousins who were either in the Bridal Party or coming in from Out of Town. Not a single person complained about having to arrange for child care. Infact, it seemed like most of our guests with children were really looking forward to a night off since those are few and far between for them.

Do what you want to do. It’s your wedding so you get to call the shots.

Post # 10
Member
328 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m with yah girl!

Post # 11
Member
1365 posts
Bumble bee

It’s not your only option. You could cut the plus 1s and invite the kids.

Post # 13
Member
899 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I think it’s perfectly fine. Especially if you don’t want to have to pay extra to provide someone to keep an eye on the kids. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people don’t understand that not every situation necessitates including THEIR children, especially when it’s not an event they are shelling out money for.

Post # 14
Member
620 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I’m not having kids at mine except for Fiance nieces and nephews. I don’t want kids running around and being loud and rewening things that we paid for, I know that  some kids are so well behaved but I can’t say that one couple’s kids can come because they are well behaved but another person’s can’t because they are not so I just decided form early on that its going to be adults only event.

Post # 15
Member
230 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I am doing the exact same thing as you.  It was very important to Fiance and I that every guest has a plus 1.  I know that some people might not take this well but it is the way we want to allocate the guest list/budget.  

Post # 16
Member
31 posts
Newbee

I think that it is fine not to have children at your wedding, and your guests should understand, especially if they are children that you are not close too. I know that I will be having some children at my wedding, but not very many. The best thing to do is to make it clear who you are inviting on the invite, and also use rsvp cards, a website, or number that will give you a verification of exactly who your guests are.

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