(Closed) No kids at reception….problem. HELP!

posted 8 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
363 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

We are torn on how to handle this as well. If you decide to let all the children come I think it would be easy to explain, because they’re family and one of the children was in the wedding. But, it’s your day and if his brother understands then I would just work it out with him!

Post # 4
Member
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I think the key to your issue is the Future Brother-In-Law doesn’t want his kids there.  He would rather have a nice night out with out the hassle of the kids.  That should give you some ground to stand on with your Future Mother-In-Law.  

Post # 6
Member
363 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Aare you compromising on other items with her? Or is this the only thing that has come up? I know this is a BIG item to compromise on though…  I don’t know what your relationship is like with her, but if you think it will be something she will be upset about for a long time or not contribute as much then you may have to compromise and let just those children come.  If you’ve compromised on other items I would ask your Fiance and Future Brother-In-Law to talk with her and try to explain their wishes.  Sorry, I don’t think I’ve been much help!

Post # 7
Member
510 posts
Busy bee

We’re also having an adults only reception– for the most part.  My 3 nieces are in the wedding, too, and they’ll be attending the reception.  I think other guests would understand, esp if one is in the wedding (and the other is a sibling). 

That said, it depends on what you and Fiance are comfortable with.  Since it’s your Future Mother-In-Law, I would just include them in the reception.  She’ll appreciate it and it’s a nice gesture for your soon-to-be in laws.

Post # 8
Member
1276 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

It looks like its not her decision since your Future Brother-In-Law doesn’t want to bring his kids. I’m having an adult only reception but I’m also not having any kids in my wedding party. 

Post # 10
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

If one of the kids is the ring bearer than I think you can just make an exception for him and his siblings. My reception is adult only, but the kids who are in the wedding and a few others are invited

Post # 13
Member
363 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’d have your Fiance and Future Brother-In-Law talk to her about how you’ve compromised on that and that your Future Brother-In-Law doesn’t want them there! Maybe if she’s reminded of some things you’ve given into already she will be more okay with not having all of the kids. 

Post # 14
Member
510 posts
Busy bee

I can see how it would be a slippery slope, esp if you have a lot of kids in your family.  If your own niece isn’t coming, that kind of changes things….. i say either all of the kids in the wedding party (&sibs) can come to reception, or no kids at all.  It’s not fair to invite her grandchildren but not your own nieces!  That might offend your sister/brother.

My sister (MOH) had an issue with us not inviting kids- even though hers are invited!  She just feels strongly about it.  It’s a sensitive issue– but I know how dealing with everyone’s opinions can make it difficult 🙁

Post # 15
Member
1701 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I think you have to make it an all or nothing deal as far as nieces/nephews are concerned.  If you don’t want them at the reception, I wouldn’t have them in the wedding party either.

The only children at my wedding were our nieces/nephews and they were all in the wedding party.  I think they had more fun than anyone!  Only one cousin gave me a hard time about it, everyone else wanted to leave their kids at home.

It doesn’t apply here, but I don’t get people who think they should bring their kids.  Did they have kids at their wedding a couple years ago?  Probably not.  I hope I don’t turn into them…

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