- 3 years ago
My SO’s father passed away a couple of years ago and the family hasn’t celebrated Christmas since [in terms of gifts for each other…we just do a small dinner]. At first I thought maybe it would just be for the first year, but now my SO’s mother has said she doesn’t want to exchange gifts ever again. She just announced it without really getting input from the kids. My SO was upset by this, but never said anything as he didn’t want to upset his mother.
Thing is, I still want to celebrate Christmas in our little family of two and my family still wants to celebrate it with him. We enjoy giving gifts. But now whenever I try to talk to my SO about us getting each other Christmas gifts [or if my family asks what to get him], he makes comments like ‘we don’t do Christmas anymore, remember?’ or says that he wants nothing.
It makes me feel extremely guilty, like I’m a horrible greedy person for wanting to exchange gifts. But it’s what I grew up doing. I can’t help it.
Please know this isn’t just about me getting gifts myself or anything, I know it’s not all about the presents… it’s about who’s present with you. I can’t even begin to imagine what Christmas would be like without a family member, I haven’t experienced that kind of loss yet myself.
But that being said, how do I navigate this? Anyone been in a situation like this before?
- This topic was modified 3 years, 4 months ago by authentic.