(Closed) No longer waiting, I broke up with him

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
Post # 32
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Definitely sounds like you made the right decision.

Post # 33
Member
4304 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

As soon as I read this I thought: this guy is gay.  So reason #1 you don’t want to marry a gay man lol! ๐Ÿ™‚ Good for you!

Post # 34
Member
636 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I completely agree with GoldfishPie!

Print that list out and carry it with you always! I wish I would have done this with some of my abyssmal relationships, because there will come a day, probably very soon, where you will miss him and romanticize what you had. For some reason our brains head to the good aspects of a relationship when it has ended and ignore the glaring reasons we got out of it.

Good for you. After reading your list, I was cheering for you. You and your son deserved much better and now you are free to go out and find it. ๐Ÿ™‚ Hugs and prayers to you. It isn’t going to be easy, but you did the right thing!!!

Post # 35
Member
3586 posts
Sugar bee

I didn’t wonder if he was gay, but once I saw #1, I was like, yeah, not even worth the trouble.LOL

Post # 36
Member
484 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
@Mrs. Harmony: There is the possibility that he watches straight porn to look at the guys. If he doesn’t want to admit to himself that he is gay, he might not be comfortable watching gay porn either. Or was it pure lesbian porn you found?

Post # 37
Member
1398 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I am very happy you made the break and can now move on and hopefully find someone who will appreciate you and your son. I have been in your shoes, sadly, more than once. Being in a relationship is not always better than being alone. I would highly advise that you take a man break, at least for a little while and really work on your self and figure out what and who it is you truly want and deserve in your life. I had a friend, say to me years ago “Needy women attract losers.” I have to totally agree with that statement, because when I was emotionally needy, that’s exactly what I got. One book I would tell you to read, cover to cover is “He’s Not That Into You.” Reading that book was sort of a turning point for me because it made me realize that I was needy, and settling for men who weren’t my ideal, weren’t fulfilling in any way and that I truly deserved better. I am happy to say that I have a fantastic, healthy relationship with a man who fulfills me completely. Don’t settle for anything less than that, for yourself. I sincerely wish you the best!

Post # 38
Member
2468 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

good for you for leaving! you deserve so much more

Post # 39
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

It sounds like you made a wise decision.  I agree that you should print this out and put it somewhere you can refer back to.  I had the “relationship that just would not die” once, and I had to constantly remind myself why I left so I wouldn’t go back the final time. 

I have to say, I did have a boyfriend for a couple years that I eventually heard through a reputable source that he saw him making out with a guy, but never admitted it, and still hasn’t officially come out, but I broke up with him anyway.  I have to say the way you describe your sex life sounds very familiar…

Post # 40
Member
82 posts
Worker bee

Frist – CONGRATS!!!!!!  I love love love the list and poop poop on who said it won’t help you heal –  therapist always suggest writing and listing – its a release and I think you did exactly what you needed to start healing – putting it out there for the Bees to support you, encourage you , laugh and cry with you !!! GOOD JOB :))))))) 

The gayer comment, dang I missed it in reading it cause I was too busy cheering you on in my mind…but, yeah, I see it now, interesting, but who cares, your out of the relationship and that is all that matters !! 

Great day to spring into a new life and new journey !! Good luck and chin up on the rough days ๐Ÿ™‚ 

Post # 41
Member
1295 posts
Bumble bee

It sounds like you totally made the right decsion.  I’m glade you decided not to waste another minute of your life on that douch.  I know it’s all worth it because one day sooner or later hopefully sooner you’ll find a guy to love you and your son the way you all deserve to be.  Good Luck and here is to new beginnings!

Post # 42
Member
82 posts
Worker bee

View original reply
@ChocolateApple:Classy ??? Seriously ??? It was a class act !! People like you who comment don’t get the meaning of the board. Its a place to express yourself !!!!!!!!! Regardless of what is being expressed. Why did you bother to continue reading it through and commenting on it if you found it so distasteful ??? 

Post # 43
Member
3306 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
@HappilyEverAfter54: I completely agree- I am so proud of you and I am glad that you see that a proposal from this guy probably wouldn’t have been the best thing for you or him because you would have been so unhappy with all of the htings he DOESN’T do for you- *hugs*…. I bet the guy for you is right around the corner now and since you freed yourself up- you will be available to meet and date him.

Post # 44
Member
270 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Wow.. He does sound like a douche, and I’m sorry you lived with that! I felt very similar in a few situations you wrote about and I could feel your frustration and pain.

I know you will be WAY more happy and live a full life! Meet a man worth you! Someone who can’t keep his hands off and compliments you all the time especially about how lucky he is to have you! Those are the words of love ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 45
Member
1325 posts
Bumble bee

I’m so happy for you OP. I’m happy you have the self respect to leave this man. I’m happy you love yourself enough.

Often times after ditching a loser and having a HUGE epiphany about your self worth, something magical happens. The most wonderful guy ever just falls into your life. It happened to me!

Post # 46
Member
2355 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

HUGZ! I hope you stick around WB so we could hear all about that GREAT guy you’re bound to find, someone who actually deserve you!

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