Post # 1
I know this topic has probably been beaten to death, and I know as someone who doesn’t have kids I probably don’t have the right to talk, but I just have to say something…
I get 45 minutes for lunch between classes. During that time, I don’t allow myself to even think about work. I bring a book, order a sandwich, and relax in a booth at my favorite quick service place. I treasure this time and yeah, occasionally a crying child annoys me, but I have never seen anything like this.
Two women with five kids were letting the kids go absolutely nuts. They were screaming when I walked in the door and were still screaming when I left. They were crawling under tables (OTHER PEOPLE’s tables), chasing each other, throwing food. I was on the opposite side of the room and I could hear every word they were shouting to each other. And the mom was just laughing, joking with the kids, which made them laugh and scream louder (they were happy screams, not buy me something screams). Everywhere I looked people were turning their heads to stare with annoyed looks and sighing. It was so bad even the waiter apologized to me when he brought my food! As I walked past the table to leave after 20 minutes of this nonsense (about all I can stand), I very clearly heard one mom laugh to the other “I bet everyone here hates us hahaha!”
Since when did this become acceptable behavior? I get that wrangling five kids is tough and this wasn’t a five star joint, but it’s not McDonalds either and they were treating the restraunt like it was one big indoor playplace. Is it ever acceptable to say anything in this kind of situation? What would y’all have done?
Post # 3
Last week when I was at the grocery store, a kid sat in the cart screaming at the top of his lungs for over 20 minutes. All the mom did was say calmly “what a nice voice you have.”
I wanted to strangle them both.
Post # 4
@Dizbee: That’s just brutal and I would be totally frustrated.
I would be so tempted to say anything but I wouldn’t have the guts. Honestly, I think the restaurant should have been the ones to speak up. They have the right to say something if a customer is being disruptive to their business and other customers. If *I* had been the waiter, I’d have spoken to a manager to ask them to say something.
Post # 5
@Dizbee: i’m a nanny and i understand where you’re coming from, i loooove children but it annoys me so bad when parents act so oblivious to their child’s beavior and just let them run around or do things that are clearly disturbing others. I know with the children i watch there’s a clear line of how they can act in public, especially a restaurant, yeah kids are unpredictable and can get out of control but it is up to the parents to discipline them.
Post # 6
@Lyndzo: agreed, it should have been the restaurant’s place to step in and say something. i have never said anything because being a nanny i know i would get very annoyed if someone told me what to do with the kids i watch.
Post # 7
I think what annoyed me most was that they were laughing right along with the kids! if I saw them trying to do something or even apologizing to the people around them I’d be a lot more sympathetic but it was like they were encouaging them to act that way. I’m not a parent, but I was a regular nanny for two years and was responsible for taking an ADD six yea old out for shopping trips, dentist appointments, food stops and what have you. If we were at a resterant and she opened her mouth to scream, she knew exactly what would happen. I’d ask for a to go box pay the bill and we were gone. I know that’s not practical to do every time when you have your own kids, but there is no need to lol about it like it’s a big joke.
Post # 8
I find it unacceptable and I don’t know if I want to see them as teenagers! If a kid went under my table or came around me, I would tell the child to stop.
Post # 9
I would have said something to the moms, and then gotten the manager. That is rude, I don’t give 2 shits who you are, unless you are in damn McD’s you better get your kids under control!
Post # 10
I remember being a kid and getting everywhere BUT we were NEVER permitted to throw food, scream or run around other people tables, the only restaurant I remember being allowed to run around in was a local one down the street we grew up with and ONLY when we were the only ones there but that was almost like visiting a family friend (except we paid for dinner) when we got rambuncious they brought us stuff to colour with and even had us folding pizza boxes for them! It was great!
I understand when kids talk a little loud and there’s only so much you can do BUT you can keep them from screaming and running around, if you can’t then leave and take them home. I would be peeved even if this happened at McD’s.
Post # 11
Crawling under other people’s tables… that’s just awful.
I agree with Lyndzo, I think the restaurant should have done something. They may have been worried about losing them as customers, but what about all the other customers they could have lost?
If I was eating there and it was bugging me enough, I would have asked for the manager and complained.
Post # 12
I try to tell myself that even the most well-behaved children have once-in-a-blue-moon tantrums, and that this is that time and the moms are mortified. Probably not the case usually, but it helps somewhat. Though the mom laughing at how inconvenienced everyone else must be is pretty pitiful.
Post # 13
I think that in this situation the mom’s were definately out of line. But I do have to speak up for some unusual situtations. When i was in college I worked as a “community habituation trainor” for autistic children. Basically, it was my job to try to teach autistic kids how to function in their communities. I had one 5 year old boy who was absolutely terrified of going to new places. Mom’s main goal was to be able to take her son to the grocery. The problem is that he would scream his head off every time they went into the grocery. She couldn’t bear to cause him pain so she quit trying. And that, when extrapolated beyond the grocery, was a huge hassle in her life. So it became my job to aclimate him to going to new places. We started at the grocery. I knew this was not going to go well so I went in the middle of the day on a weekday when it isn’t very crowded. And he screamed. We stayed exactly 2 minutes and he screamed at full force the whole time. People gave me horrible looks. But the next week he didn’t scream quite so loud. And the next week he only wimpered. And the next week we were there for at least 2 minutes before he started screaming. Several months later, mom could take her son to the grocery. He still screamed sometimes, but not all the time, every time. So if you see a screaming child, give the parenst the benefit of the doubt. Unless they say “I bet everyone here hates us hahaha!”
Post # 14
This reminds me a lot of this article:
I get so irritated with people who think it’s “cute” when their kids act like heathens. My dad definitely had “the look” with us.
Post # 15
@MrsJazzy: These were not even tantrums though! It would be one thing if a child was being fussy and screaming over not wanting to eat chicken fingers for lunch, but these kids were encouraged to run around a resturant like it was a jungle gym, at the expense of everyone else trying to enjoy a meal. :
Post # 16
I feel like discipline has just gone completely out the door in this society. People blur the lines between discipline and cruelty, and they refuse to discipline because they don’t want to hurt little Johnny’s precious feelings. Why people think their bad kids are cute is beyond me. But, I see it all the time and it drives me crazy. When I was a child, I knew how to behave in a restuarant. I sat down, colored on the little paper they give you, and ate my meal. My parents and the adults in my life would also interact with me so that I wouldn’t get bored and act up. I knew that I would not be allowed to go out to dinner anymore if I acted up, and didn’t want to lose that privilege. Today, nothing is a privilege. Everything is an entitlement to kids. It is a parent’s responsibility to mold their child into a functioning adult, and that requires discipline. If children are taught that inconsiderate behavior is acceptable from the start, they’re never going to grow out of that. In twenty years, little Johnny from that restuarant is gonna bring five extra people to a wedding he didn’t RSVP to and get slam drunk and trash the venue, lmfao!
I have noticed that a lot of parents learn to tune out their kids. What they don’t take into consideration, though, is that no stranger in public has mastered this skill. I was in Khol’s the other day and this woman’s kid was screaming bloody murder in the cart. The mother was just casually browsing through the racks, like she couldn’t hear the kid screaming. I guess someone gave her a dirty look because she said something along the lines of, “We ain’t going anywhere!” It was quite obvious the child needed a nap/was uncomfortable. But, the mother was shopping and that was all that mattered to her. And that’s another issue, entirely. Sometimes it doesn’t matter how the child is disciplined. If a toddler needs a nap, they’re gonna get cranky. As a mother, you should know when your child should be napping and opt to shop around their sleep schedule, instead of dragging a tired kid into public and forcing them to stay awake for an event that is boring to no end (in their minds).