Post # 1
I’ve decided that I do not want to have a maid of honor. I have 6 girls standing up and I Love them all the same. My fiance also can’t choose a best man. The question is, who gives the speech?
Post # 3
@maliarodrigue: You don’t have to have a Maid/Matron of Honor or a Bridesmaid or Best Man. You do have to have witnesses iin most states if you are in the USA.
Be prepared for some hurt feelings though, if you want one of your BM’s and/or one of the groomsmen to do the work without the title.
Post # 4
it’s up to you?
maybe just your parents do?
Maybe you don’t need anyone to?
Maybe someone wants to give a speech and that can be their special honor for the day?
Post # 5
- Wedding: May 2014 - Scottish Rite Cathedral (New Castle, PA)
I also don’t have a Maid/Matron of Honor, I chose the girl that has been most involved with us as a couple. I also had one girl that said she wanted to, if she sticks with that I’d let her as well. If any of them are your sister and you’re close I’d think about that too. FI’s older brother will be giving a speech. I’d look at their personalities (who enjoys or is comfortable public speaking? Who knows what’s appropriate? Etc), I have one Bridesmaid or Best Man I’d never ask because she’s shy and hates giving speeches.
Post # 6
Maybe just have the bridesmaid who has known you the longest do the speech, same rules apply for who does the speech out of the groomsmen? Or just have the parents do speeches? Or another significant family member like a favourite auntie or grandparent?
Post # 8
I felt the same way – I felt weird asking any of one my bridesmaids to be Maid/Matron of Honor, so I didn’t have a Maid/Matron of Honor. Just bridesmaids. As far as the toast, I asked the bridesmaid who knew me and my husband best as a couple. Not all of the bridesmaids knew my husband as well, or had spent as much time with us as a couple. I also knew that the one I asked would be comfortable with public speaking. None of my other bridesmaids ever said anything about it, and I didn’t make a big deal out of it. I also think that giving a toast could be a special role given to someone outside of the bridal party – someone you are close to but is not in the wedding party for whatever reason.
Post # 9
My DH had a best man but I didn’t have a Maid/Matron of Honor. My Bridesmaid or Best Man were my two closest girlfriends and my two SIL. In terms of speeches, my most outgoing Bridesmaid or Best Man was the one that gave the speech as she was the only one that felt comfortable speaking in front of the crowd. I don’t think it’s terrible for multiple people to give a joing speech, and have actually seen it done really well. Perhaps that’s a choice?
Post # 10
Thank you guys for all your input. Three out of the six girls are having me be their Maid/Matron of Honor. One I stand up this year. I asked the girls and they all want to say something. I’m honored but I just don’t want the speech to be too long if they do a pass the mic thing.
Post # 11
@maliarodrigue: What speech? I’m pretty sure no speech is required.
Post # 12
@maliarodrigue: I was in a wedding with nine girls and non Maid/Matron of Honor. Us BMs discussed it, and as much as all of us love the bride, most of us hate public speaking. So two of the girls, who actually would enjoy it, ended up sharing the speech. It worked out really well.
Post # 13
You could always forgo the speeches! As both my sisters’ Maid/Matron of Honor, I didn’t do a speech, only the best man did a toast.
Post # 14
A friend of mine didn’t have a Maid/Matron of Honor, and it caused a bit of confusion on the events leading up to the wedding and the day-of, so just make sure everyone has a clear idea on what they need to do/what you want them to do!