(Closed) No paper invitation? (poll)

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: How would you feel if you got an e-invitation instead of a paper invite?


    Would think you're cheap, but would understand

    Wouldn't care

    Love it- save your money

  • Post # 32
    350 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I put offended, but I wouldn’t be offended.  I just would not take it seriously.  I have used evites for other events (bachelorette party, surprise birthday parties).  But other than that, I think a wedding needs a card in hand.

    Post # 33
    1365 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    We did e-only but we designed them ourselves. 

    The older guests all RSVP’d through the website or email.  No one got offended and most of them are coming.

    Post # 34
    629 posts
    Busy bee

    I didn’t read all the responses, but what I was taught was that e-vites shouldn’t be used for a wedding UNLESS the wedding is 100% eco-friendly. Also, I think e-vites may throw off the older generation.

    Post # 35
    3051 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

    View original reply
    @Zhabeego:  I agree with you.

    I think it takes the formality out of the wedding for sure! But I still wouldn’t show up in jeans. I would probably question how casual it was going to be though, and if it was an evening event, I would be confused.


    Post # 36
    816 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Personally I wouldn’t care if I got an e-vite.  The absolute truth of the matter is, except for some family members, the invitations despite how much money you spent on them will end up in the bin.  I think it also depends on the family, I know that my family expected me to send paper invitations so that was not an option to me.

    So if it saves the couple some money I’m okay with that =)

    Post # 37
    614 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2014 - Smithfield Center

    I wouldn’t care if I get an e-vite but you have to take something into consideration. Do you have a lot of older people coming? I have a couple of older grandparents coming and I guarantee you not only would they be offended they didn’t get a paper invitation, but they would have NO CLUE how to even read an invitation online (one of them doesn’t even have a computer!)

    Post # 39
    634 posts
    Busy bee

    I’m tactile, so the act of touching a book or a letter or an invitation adds a lot of its specialness for me. An e-vite still gives me all the information I need, but not that special element of touching and unfolding and reading and exploring. That said, my reaction to an e-vite is about on par with my reaction to a budget invitation route, like a post card. I would say if plush invites aren’t in your budget, go for the e-vite and don’t let anyone pressure you into mailing something out.


    Ultimately, while I perfere receiving a fancy pants paper invite, I would NEVER judge a couple poorly for their choice to not blow money on it. It’s your money, it’s your party, and ultimately, the format of your invitations is not going to have ANY influence on the quality of the celebration, or the marriage you’re celebrating.

    Post # 40
    266 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @SleepyBee99:  I would probably think it was cheap and would not take it very seriously.  I know that’s stupid, especially as a bride knowing there are so many options, but I feel like a wedding deserves a little more formality than an e-vite.  Just my thoughts, please do what suits you and yours, ignore the haters!

    Post # 41
    1926 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I think it really depends on the situation- we’re eloping and throwing a party when we get back so I feel like e-RSVPs or evites would be okay. However, if you’re having a black-tie formal wedding I think that regular invites are a bit more appropriate. We’re actually sending party invitations on the back of our wedding announcements! 

    Post # 42
    718 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I love the idea of it, and I think we’ll eventually trend in that direction, but personally I think people just aren’t there yet.  We’re doing paper invitations from Minted (within our budget and we love them) but also have a wedding app with the option to RSVP through there. We haven’t even turned on that feature.  Probably 25% of our guests would be lost and honestly it’s just easier with the paper.  Someday though!

    Post # 43
    1285 posts
    Bumble bee

    I’m having a small wedding…I’m doing paper invites because I know a fair amount of family members on both sides, older folks, don’t have access to a computer or have a computer/smart phone. I don’t think it’s fair to them.  My father is all up with the times, but doesn’t have a computer, but wouldn’t RSVP on his smart phone. I think he’d get pissed off if I did something like rsvps online.

    Post # 44
    11517 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @SleepyBee99:  Personally, I think evites for weddings are tacky.  Less formal and less important things I don’t mind them but for something like a wedding I feel like it needs a formal invite.  Tacky may be the wrong word, but I definitely think they’re inappropriate for weddings.  (also – with spam filters and how easy it is to change email addresses these days it would be harder to keep track of them and make sure people receieved them).

    Post # 45
    402 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    I wouldn’t be offended myself, but I would not do it myself.  I have some guests coming that do not have a computer, nor do they know how to use one.  I think it may be a little tacky.  A wedding should at least deserve a paper invite.

    Post # 46
    1065 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I wanna second a PP that Paperless Post is awesome. Some of the evites are BEAUTIFUL. Most of their designs can be done in paper form and are pretty expensive. I’m gonna use Paperless Post for save-the-dates, if not the invitations themselves.

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