(Closed) No proposal yet. Is he my Fiancé?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
5304 posts
Bee Keeper

As far as I’m concerned whether you call him your boyfriend or your fiance is whatever the two of you are happy with. He hasn’t ‘officially’ proposed, so perhaps you might want to use the term ‘boyfriend’ just to prevent people from asking you to see the ring and then having to explain it’s not ready yet etc. But your guy has already announced it to people & you’ve secured a venue- so he could be considered your fiance as well. 

Post # 3
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

IMO, if he’s telling everyone that you’re both getting married in February AND you’ve booked a venue, then you’re definitely engaged! Ring or no ring. Congratulations on your engagement! 

ETA: I agree with PP, though, that it’s up to you on what you want to call this. People will probably ask to see the ring, and if you don’t feel comfortable with trying to explain about a lack of a ring, then maybe wait. But it’s completely up to both of you. You should ask him what he thinks and prefers too!

Post # 4
415 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Our Church


View original reply
leekissesme:  Depends on you. Do you want to call him fiance now or would you rather wait until he proposes?

I would rather wait until he proposes, but that is just me:)

Post # 6
3664 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

Call him whatever you like. It’s up to you two to decide what engaged is for you. Some people don’t want/get rings but they are most definitely engaged. If you would like to wait until the proposal happens that’s fine. If you want to start calling him your Fiance now (you guys have already started locking in plans so you aren’t jumping the gun or anything) then go ahead. I don’t think there’s a “proper” etiquette regarding this kind of thing.

Post # 7
361 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

View original reply
leekissesme:  I was in the same boat we got the ring togeather and who new it would take so long for it to arrive. Then he had it remade because it was not as perfect as he wanted it to be. So we were planinng the whole thing before we where techinally engaged. I found it wierd but no one even said anything. I even went dress shopping before the ring. I still have a had time saying Fiance. So that was not an issue. I say it once in a while but most of the time I still say boyfriend. What I have learned form this whole thing is enjoy the time and do what you want no matter what others have to say. So it you want to call him Fiance do it. Just be happy. There is just too much in wedding planes that make you unhappy. The hell with everyone else. 

Post # 8
2235 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

You’re engaged! First time around I didn’t have a ring for a few weeks, I wasn’t sure I wanted one (love rings, – just wasn’t sure about the idea of engagement rings). 

Here in the UK it isn’t uncommon for couples to get engaged and choose a ring together at a later date. 

Post # 10
8600 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

I think he’s your boyfriend until he thinks its official.

Post # 11
8486 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

View original reply
leekissesme:  Sounds to me like you’re engaged — Congratulations!

I know you said no snark, and this isn’t meant as snark, more like an observation. But this is really silly: “He hasn’t proposed yet (he won’t until the ring is secured in the next 4-6 weeks and won’t officially ask until that time because that’s what “a real man/provider” does)“. If he actually said this, I would wonder what the hell he means, because if or when you get a ring does not have anything to do with being “a real man” or “provider”. That sounds like caveman chest-pounding. My husband and I mutually agreed to get married, and then we went and bought a ring together. I can assure you, he is a real man and he provides just fine. Sorry to digress, it just struck me odd. Happy planning.

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