- 6 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
Just need some advice on how to proceed with my current situation…
When we got engaged, Fi’s parents said they’d be happy to pay for the rehearsal dinner. They are pretty well off, and paying for something like that isn’t a concern. However, after a few months they decided that they don’t want to invite any out of town family or friends (even though they are flying in from the other side of the country for the wedding) because they want it to be more “intimate”, and that it’s not because of “budget concerns”. (There would be a much larger group with those included). My mom was not a fan of this when she heard, as her whole family will expect to be invited after being invited to all other familiy wedding RD’s, and for flying in for the weekend.
Fi’s parents said they would rather do two events- a “welcome party” for all guests, and a “rehearsal lunch” for just bridal party/immediate family. I though this was a fantastic idea, but not to feel forced to host two separate events. They insisted that they would be fine.
Now the wedding is coming up in 2 months and virtually no planning has been done for either event. I feel a little awkward butting into planning, but there are lots of guests asking about plans and we need to get the rehearsal scheduled with our venue & pastor. My mom, Fi, and I have tried politely reaching out about it, but every time we do it seems as if the wedding in general is their last priority. It may be important to point out that while they have money, Fi’s parents are not really entertainers and themselves got married at the courthouse.
I just feel weird because I don’t want to pressure someone into hosting something, and at this point my parents would be more than happy to host/pay in order for the weekend to go smoothly and have it be nice for our guests. I’m also probably disappointed because I envisioned his family being excited about planning and being involved, especially after offering to host TWO events! That is so generous, but just leaves our family in an awkward position right now with nothing being done.No invites, no room reservation, nothing.
Bees, have any of you dealt with similar situations? Should I just relax and hope it all works out the weekend of and people aren’t too confused? I’m also probably disappointed because I envisioned his family being excited about planning and being involved, especially after offering to host TWO events! That is so generous, but just leaves our family in an awkward position right now with nothing being done.