(Closed) No respect for other people's relationship. Some guys are just dirtbags!

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 4
Member
3885 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

You can’t judge an entire population of men based on the action of just one guy, just like it would be really unfair to say “my fiance has to be mean to all women he meets just because one of them tried to hit on him even though he said he was engaged.”  There are jerks and schemers of both genders.  Fortunately, though, most folks are just nice people who are perfectly happy to make a new friend without having romantic intentions.

Post # 5
Member
2390 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Well, as long as HE’s single, he wasn’t really doing anything wrong.  It’s not his job to protect your relationship, it’s yours, and it sounds like you did so.  Not sure what the big deal is.

Post # 7
Member
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@oneofthesethings:  +1

I don’t know why people need to get all uppity about it. if he was single, he was perfectly legitimate in his actions.

Post # 10
Member
4370 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@strawbs:  I don’t know… imo, being single doesn’t open the door to pursuing people in relationships.  If he was totally oblivious to the fact that she was in a relationship, that’s one thing, but it sounds like he knew and didn’t care. I wouldn’t want a girl hitting on/trying to hook up with my Darling Husband after finding out he’s married – I know he’d shut it down, but it still feels disrespectful.

Post # 11
Member
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@LadyBear:  nobody said the door was open. They are at liberty to try. being single only lessens the wrong, it doesn’t eliminate it.

Post # 12
Member
1895 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I agree with the OP. Some men (& women for that matter) have no respect. If I’m single, it doesn’t mean it’s right for me to pursue a married man. 

…just my opinion though. 

Post # 13
Member
9118 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Chiming in here for the other end of the perspective.. sorta.

In March, 2012, I was in a moderately happy (I was well on my way to being unhappy), very stable relationship for the last three and a half years. I was going to settle for this man and marry him regardless of my happiness level once he proposed. My husband (then) was single, and once we reconnected, he asked me out on a date. I accepted, and I left my boyfriend of three years.

You may judge me as you wish if you feel the need, but I have no sorrows or regrets about the situation, and I was not angry at my (now) husband for disrespecting my (then) relationship.

Instead of ending up in a marriage where I would simply exist from morning to night, I’m in a marriage where I am happy and I love my husband. So, I’m not saying it’s alright for everyone to chase down everyone else for a relationship, but I’m saying that sometimes it can work out for the persuer.

You were in a happy relationship, and that’s fine. He was looking for someone who wasn’t, quite obviously. Just because you’re in a committed relationship, or engaged, does not mean you’re happy. But you put him in his place and stepped away from the situation — why be mad?

Leaving my ex boyfriend was the best thing I ever did, and I probably never would have if my husband hadn’t disrespected my relationship.

Post # 16
Member
8483 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2014

I had a customer get mad at me the other night when I told him I was engaged. He was trying to force me to give him my number and I refused. He finally left, but before he did he told me that he was “going to win.”

Creep.

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