(Closed) No response cards–Okay or not?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
3526 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Hi

We battled for this a bit as well because of the lack of guests going online to check out our site when we sent out Save The Dates. We’re hoping that now there is a reason to they will!

We wrote:

Please RSVP Online at
http://www.ourwedding.com
Login: username Password: wedding
By July 7, 2010

We thought about including a phone number but Fiance really did not like that. Which I’m OK with because everyone we’re inviting knows of way to get in touch with us. whether it’s through email, cell, or our parents.

 

Post # 4
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We didn’t do response cards either and it’s been fine thus far (we also only really need numbers for the favours so I know how many to make and how many extra to have in case). We just put “Please RSVP by May 1st” and had “For more information, please visit [Website URL]” elsewhere on the invite. 

Post # 5
Member
605 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think it’s OK to ask your guests to RSVP online or call (in case you’ve got some non-internet savvy guests or those without computer access). I would imagine you need to be willing to do more work tracking down RSVPs than those who use response cards, but maybe not. I was surprised that my super-proper mom suggested skipping reply cards. She’s usually Emily Post all the way, so I take that as a sign that not doing them is OK from an etiquette perspective.

Post # 6
Member
133 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would have LOVED to do this.  If you’re family is mostly online and not that fussy/traditional then you should go for it!  Sounds fantastic to me.

Post # 7
Member
268 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Our family and friends would be cyborgs and permanently wired to the web if that technology were possible so we’re having everyone RSVP via a plugin we found for word-press.  I’m including a small insert in the invitation with the RSVP code(s) for everyone except FI’s grandma.  We’ll call to get her RSVP or include a card with a SASE.

Post # 8
Member
1135 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

We did this and it worked just fine.  On the bottom of our invitation we said:

To RSVP and for more information http://www.mrandmrsmdphd.com

Everyone figured it out.  Make sure that whichever website you use works well (we used theknot.com and had some issues, so guests were emailing me saying that they couldn’t get the RSVP function to work) but at that point it was too late to change.  My grandparents, who are 87, were among the first to RSVP on our website.  They had no problems at all.  I had a few guests grumble about it, but when I informed my MOH’s VERY proper, but very practical mother of exactly how much money I saved, she shut up.  I don’t know who decided that in order to be polite, or formal, things have to be done through the mail.  But I say that’s ridiculous.  Good luck!

Post # 9
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I did this! We are also having two receptions. Since it didnt matter how many people came to the first one and we basically knew who would and would not com to the 2nd, we did ours through our Wedding Wire website. (PM me and I will give you the address). Our “RSVP” card in teh invitation reads:

For RSVP, detailed maps, and accomodations please visit:

WEBSITE

Please respond by June First

Post # 10
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I think having them RSVP on your wedding Web site is fine (though you may not get a lot of responses, but you know your guests better than us), but don’t ask them to mail you a note.  I don’t think it’s really fair to make your guests buy their own envelopes/postage/etc. when it’s generally customary for the hosts to send this.  Just my opinion though…

Post # 11
Member
941 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

we’re definitely doing RSVP, maps and information online. since Fiance is a web designer and developer, it will be really easy for us and i’m happy to save money on envelopes, rsvp cards and postage! i do everything by web these days, so i don’t see why this would be an exception. it’s a different world out there, now. 🙂

Post # 12
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I have contemplaited doing the RSVP, directions and other information online, but not sure I have the time to actually design and build a website in time, due to finals and researchpapers due this coming month (and I’d have to know for sure I’d had one before sending out the invites obviously). So I am probably going to include them in the invitation enveloppe after all.

Our RSVPs will be postcard style though, so we don’t need any small matching envies for the RSVPs, and while the postcards will be self-addressed they won’t be stamped. I doubt any of our guests will mind sticking a stamp on there themselves. For some reason I feel that wedding traditions here are a lot less strict and don’t include a lot of the things that are common in the States. Which in this case suits me fine /giggles

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