Post # 31
You definitely don’t need a ring to be engaged! If you agree to get married and you start planning, you’re engaged! My SO has my ring and I’m just waiting for him to propose so I can start planning. I didn’t feel right planning before we were officially engaged.
Post # 32
I think it depends on the situation. I knew my proposal was coming, and was already unofficially planning. I used to say we were half engaged.
Post # 33
I don’t have a ring yet but wedding plans are coming along. Everyone around us knows we are getting married. We still call each other bf or gf, on occasions fience. It is whatever YOU make of it.
We do not say we are engaged. We say ” We are getting married”
Post # 34
Technically, if your SO asks you to marry them and you say yes, you’re engaged.
With that being said, I wouldn’t accept a proposal without a ring. I just don’t see the point, I would rather just be together than get married without a proper engagement and ring.
Post # 35
Jeo4500: I personally beleive that if both memebrs of a couple agree that they are engaged and they are workign towards getting married in some way, then they are engaged. Rings and other symbols are optional.
Of course, rings are useful as they send a signal to others that says “hello, I’m engaged and I’m using a socially acceptable norm to communciate that and make it easy for everyone to understnad.”
Post # 36
We were engaged for about 3 months before I had my ring. It was a custom made ring. We had a date and a place. I had a dress and ordered flowers. You definitely do not need a ring to be engaged.
Post # 37
We got engaged but were long distance so waited until I was with him to make the custom ring. But I consider us engaged the day he asked me to marry him. Ring is not a biggie.
Post # 38
You don’t need a ring, but you need a proposal to be engaged, IMO.
Post # 39
There are many countries in the world, probably most of them, that do not use engagement rings at all. When Fiance and I were first talking about getting engaged, I told him I didn’t need a ring, because he’s tight on money right now, but he insisted. We got engaged when he proposed, he did have the ring, but it wouldn’t have mattered. My mother did not have an engagement ring, and my parents have been married for 37 years.
Post # 40
We ask each other will you marry me all the time, but we won’t be engaged till he puts his money where his mouth is.
Post # 41
In my opinion, once both members of a couple have decided to get married or engaged, they’re engaged. It can either happen through a mutual decision, one partner can propose to the other and I’m sure there are lots of other ways I’ve not mentioned.
We’d been engaged a month by the time my custom ring was ready, but that didn’t make us any less engaged. For us, the day we got engaged was the day he proposed and I accepted.
Post # 42
Ellicott: Good Point!
Very interesting reading all your views (sorry it took ages to reply back!)
So, for all those that say a ring is not important but a propsal is… In your eyes is a couple who mutally agree to marry (so no offical “Will you marry me Darling?!” proposal) engaged or not?
Post # 43
You can totally be engaged without a ring but there should be some sort of proposal. I would not start planning our wedding without those magical words.
Post # 44
an engagement is the agreement to get married.
my husband proposed without a ring (it wasn’t ready yet) and he didn’t want to wait any longer.
we set the date and started planning. my ring came in about 6 weeks later.
i wasn’t going to wear a ring at all, it didn’t bother me, but my mom felt i needed something on my finger. i wore her engagement ring and anytime anyone asked to see my ring, i hid my hand and said i don’t have my real ring yet.
Post # 45
ajillity81: My Mum keeps saying that I need a ring too! I think she is under the impression that we (or more specifically OH) can’t afford one. Far from the truth as I don’t want one! Waste of money in my suituation because as soon as we marry I’d only wear the wedding band.