(Closed) no ring yet, can i start planning?? — SORRY SO LONG!

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Should I invite my girlfriends wedding dress shopping with me? (read below for full story)
    Yes : (32 votes)
    40 %
    No : (43 votes)
    54 %
    Other : (5 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    285 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I have not been in this position, but in my opinion it boils down to this: do you and your FI both consider yourselves to be engaged? Judging from the fact that you call him your FI and that you’ve both agreed that it’s time to start planning, I’d say that yes, you are indeed engaged. Given that, why the flip should you wait for a ring? Although traditional, whether or not someone has a ring has pretty muvh nothing to do with whether or not they are engaged, which is nothing more than an agreement to marry and then actively plan a wedding in my opinion. Have you communicated this to your friends? They may not fully understand that while you do not have the ring, you both have already made the commitment it symbolizes, in which case yeah, if I were them I would be telling you not to plan. Hopefully they understand the disctinction between the promise and the ring, and that you can make the promise before the ring.

    Post # 4
    Member
    202 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I just want to make sure I’ve got this right… you two are engaged you just don’t have a physical ring because you are waiting for a specific one to come out? Is that correct?

    If you and your FI have discussed it and says plan the wedding you two are engaged no matter if you have a ring or not. I say plan away… and include the girls. I don’t think it’s worth missing the trunk show.

    Post # 7
    Member
    4194 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

    You don’t need to wear a ring to be engaged- DH gave a family ring that had a loose stone. Long story but we didn’t have it reset until 6 days before the wedding (so I only wore a ring 6 days of our 6-month engagement)

    Unlike future mrs Q, I didn’t get the impression that you *are* engaged, since he hasn’t proposed yet. I don’t see anything wrong with starting to plan, going to the sale with him and you Mom, researching venues online, etc. But there’s a lot of planning that is dependent on your venue and date. Regardless of whether you have a ring, it’s nice to have the “will you marry me” before you get too far into planning-budgets and guest lists make a huge impact.

    EDIT: Our posts overlapped- saw that you *are* engaged, so plan ahead. No ring required, since he’s asked you!

    Post # 8
    Member
    509 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    You don’t need a ring nor do you need an official proposal to start planning a wedding if you know it’s actually going to happen. My FI told me back in March that he planned on purchasing a ring when his check went through. He proposed on May 10th and by then most everything had been booked and paid for. My Dad said, “We’re paying for a wedding and he hasn’t even proposed yet?” Lol. Yes! I also only had about 4 months to plan so we had to start booking everything as soon as he told me to start planning.

    Post # 10
    Member
    289 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I am simply obsessed with weddings. So yes, I’ve been planning mine and gathering ideas for awhile now. I haven’t done real shopping, but I”ve definitely brainstormed things that can be real, plausible possibilities! 🙂

    Post # 11
    Member
    1030 posts
    Bumble bee

    I don’t have a ring yet. He’s not proposed. But we’ve booked our venue and I’ve created our budget.

    Some friends think I’m crazy – other friends think we’re very clever! If you want to get married next year – start sooner rather than later.

    You are not alone in this situation! Smile

    Post # 12
    Member
    860 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    I think as long as you are actually engaged then go for it!

    Post # 13
    Member
    1562 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    You don’t need a ring to be engaged!  Go ahead and plan away!

    Post # 15
    Member
    530 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2012 - Hacienda los Agaves

    @futuremrsk18:  We got engaged without a ring. We were engaged and planning a wedding, the ring came later just as something cute but I wasn’t expecting it cause I didn’t feel like it’d “close the deal”.

    As future mrs Q  said, do you consider yourself engaged? if so then it doesn’t matter if there’s ring or not, you’re actively planning a wedding!

    Post # 16
    Member
    337 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    If he didnt mention even getting engaged then it would be a far stretch to start planning but that is not the case here. You are basically engaged, you dont need a ring to prove it. If he told you to start planning, plan away 🙂

    The topic ‘no ring yet, can i start planning?? — SORRY SO LONG!’ is closed to new replies.

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