(Closed) No shower for me at work.

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Please provide feedback, as I just feel left out and unappreciated...it's 4 days before my big day!
    take this as a hint : (62 votes)
    50 %
    no worries, it's just a SNAFU : (62 votes)
    50 %
  • Post # 3
    78 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I’m sorry! I know that no one is entitled to a shower, but it is odd that they throw so many showers and haven’t thrown you one. You say they do a lot of baby showers… do they also do bridal? 

    Is the person who normally organizes the showers really busy this season? If its one person who really loves to throw showers, they might just be off their game. They also might not feel like its appropriate if they aren’t invited to the wedding? Honestly, there could be 1000 reasons that don’t involve how much your coworkers like you. But, it would make me pretty self concious. 

    If it really bothers you, you could ask your closest girlfriend in the office “hey, I know we normally throw showers, and since i didn’t have one I want to make sure that I haven’t offended anyone.” I would never ask my boss that question… or anyone I wasn’t SUPER close to. 

    Post # 4
    2416 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    If you feel that you are the only one who doesn’t get the appreciation/condolences that others get, then there is probably a reason…sorry to say.

    Have they ever done something in your honor? Birthday, anything?

    I wouldn’t say anything, it will just make it more awkward. Don’t let this ruin your wonderful wedding weekend though!

    Post # 5
    5011 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    They barely acknowledged my wedding at work even though they were all invited (not a single person showed up).

    My manager, who had been there for two months when she got married, got twice as many gifts as I did.

    It stung, but I’m moving on.

    Post # 6
    46422 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Are you the one who normally does the organizing?

    Post # 7
    2893 posts
    Sugar bee

    I’d ask someone you trust, someone close to you at work. Like the other bee mentioned, ask if you’ve offended someone. I would have said, maybe it was a mixup, planner was busy,  maybe they do baby showers and not bridal showers or something. But if you lost your sister and it’s their tradition to do something for people who lost someone AND now they’ve not acknowledged your wedding…I can see why you’re concerned. Don’t get me wrong – you can’t expect someone to celebrate you. But if you’re the only one being left out of office traditions, that’s a little odd. Sorry. 🙁 Hope you figure it out. Congrats on the wedding! 🙂

    Post # 8
    1130 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    Well, if everyone is invited to the wedding, they will all be celebrating with you/giving gifts at that time. With a baby, people aren’t present at the birth, presumably, so offices throw showers to give you gifts. You mentioned they throw showers for people having children, has anyone else ever had a shower for their wedding. You may not actually be left out.

    Post # 9
    13099 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    Have they thrown other bridal showers?  Or just baby showers?  Are you inviting the co-workers to your wedding?

    Post # 11
    10367 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I’ve never seen a bridal shower at work.

    Post # 12
    1917 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    My coworkers threw my shower two days before I left for my wedding.  I was absolutely thinking the same thing, but they threw me a lovely party and gave me a very generous gift.

    Post # 13
    4159 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I could have written this myself.  Everyone else has had wedding/baby showers and I am the only one who hasn’t.  I’ve worked at my company for 4 years, people who had been here less than me got them.  Flowers for deaths…sure, for everyone else.  For me?  Nope.

    I cried on my way home the last day of work before the wedding, feeling unappreciated. 

    Some of my coworkers (my dept, a close friend, and my boss) were invited to the wedding, and we’re all close at work so everyone knew about it. 

    I’ve just forgotten about it, but trust me, I’m not the first to jump on planning someone else’s event now.

    Post # 14
    129 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I’d just ignore it. I didn’t have a single wedding shower/bachelorette party/anything. Not from work, family, friends, etc. It didn’t bother me.

    Post # 15
    3471 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

    Who is it that usually plans these types of things? Is it one person, or do different people take it on each time.  

    More than likely, it’s just an oversight and you shouldn’t read into it. 

    The topic ‘No shower for me at work.’ is closed to new replies.

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