(Closed) No showers?

posted 6 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

How close are you with the one getting married in July?  Did she have a shower?  Were you part of it?  I feel like she, of all people, should understand.  You could have a non-accusational, but honest conversation with her about how you are feeling and offer to help out with logistics since she has her hands tied with her own wedding.  I think you will regret not saying anything, if you don’t end up having a shower.  It’s a once in a lifetime experience.

Post # 5
Member
242 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Speak up.  Even if it isn’t to you Maid/Matron of Honor a close female family member.  There are people on this board that will say “Showers aren’t a requirement.  Tough luck if you don’t have one.”  But those people probably had them.  Say something to someone or I think it’s something you’ll really regret.

Post # 6
Member
3625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

If you really are bothered by this, I would speak up, even if it is a cousin or aunt (or even FMIL) hosting. It may sound crazy, but maybe they just didn’t know or they assumed someone else will take care of it. Fiance and I are literally planning everything on our own without any input from anyone else and recently, I’ve been hearing from people that they just never offered to help with any DIY projects or anything because they thought we had it all covered and that if we wanted anything, we would ask.

If it is a financial burden for your potential hostesses, maybe you can help out in some fashion or even by finding less expensive options.

Post # 7
Member
1735 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

speak up maybe you can let your Fiance know and he can say something to your bridal party or you can talk to one of your family members!

Post # 8
Member
11234 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

We’re not getting married until next summer, but I really feel like we won’t have anything thrown for us, either. 🙁

Post # 9
Member
1038 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

My Maid/Matron of Honor is my mentally challenged baby sister back in LA.  She really isn’t serving a traditional Maid/Matron of Honor role though obviously.  Only have a handful of friends in AZ.  My closest friends mainly live in LA and I’m not going back there before the wedding.  I’m really not that concerned or upset in the least that I won’t have a shower. 

Post # 10
Member
8439 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I think you should focus on the fact that you are getting married to the person you love and not on the fact of how many parties you do or don’t have thrown for you. That is what the whole wedding thing is about right?

Post # 12
Member
8439 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@Katnisseverdeen:  Nope I had no showers. But why would that make a difference?

Post # 13
Member
83 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I didn’t have a shower, and I really don’t think I’m missing out on anything.  If you want one, I would think it would be fine to say something. 

Post # 14
Member
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I would say something.  I would be upset if I didn’t have one for the mere fact that it’s part of the expirience.  I wanted a fun time where I got to hang out with the women on his side of the family and mine together.  I wanted that bonding time between our families.  I think it will be a lot of fun.  My Maid/Matron of Honor is out of state and not able to plan one like she wanted to.  Told her not to worry about it — my Grandma, sisters (both are bridesmaids), and friend who’s a bridesmaid will be handling mine.  I would bring it  up, and just because you want a shower doesn’t make you any less of a person. 

Post # 15
Member
8394 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I thought I wouldn’t care about not having a shower, but I do. I would say something. My Future Mother-In-Law jumped all over it when Fiance mentioned me being bummed about it. I know it’s not the traditional person, but I don’t mind!

Post # 16
Member
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@Westwood:  That’s good that she jumped on it.  I’m glad you will get one!

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