(Closed) NO speeches at reception?

posted 6 years ago in Reception
Post # 17
1052 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

As everyone is saying, don’t do a sign and just tell the MC not to allow anyone to grab the mic, it will be fine.  I had no speeches at my wedding and it was awesome.  DH did a quick welcome type toast that was maybe 30 seconds and that was it.

Post # 18
1440 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

We didn’t have toasts/speeches at our rehearsal dinner or at the wedding.  I’m glad we didn’t, for various personal reasons.  I don’t think anyone missed them either.  

Post # 19
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

View original reply
athenalex:  Yeah. We had some family get a little liberal with their speeches. My younger brother gave his after promising not to make a scene, and true to form, was hilariously embarrassing despite our pleas to be normal for just one day. My husband leaned over at one point and told me we should have positioned a sniper on a grassy knoll.

Post # 20
462 posts
Helper bee

speeches are my favourite part of the wedding!!

i love hearing the couples background or how they felt meeting the parents for the first time etc.


Post # 21
76 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I never even thought about it… no one is going to give a speech/toast at our reception, or I don’t think they will!

I think you should just personally tell people “we’re not doing toasts/speeches”.  Telling the DJ is probably okay too. A sign sort of seems odd to me.

Post # 22
29 posts

It is so good to read this thread!  We were thinking about no toasts/speeches, but I wasn’t sure whether that would be too weird, or would people be like, oh, poor couple, no one likes them enough to give a toast.  But it sounds like we’re not the only ones considering this! Yay!

Post # 23
845 posts
Busy bee

A sign on mic might be good idea. You know your crowd best.

Post # 24
1281 posts
Bumble bee

Were not doing speeches either! We have just told all the usual people (MOH, Bridesmaid or Best Man, dad) that we dont want them to do a speech or toast. I hate giving speeches and get very nervous so I think its probably a huge relief to them. I dont think you will need a sign, just tell the DJ not to let anyone take the mic. 

Post # 25
316 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

View original reply
athenalex:  not crazy at all! we did all of our toasts at the rehearsal dinner the night before because we figured that nobody at the reception really wanted to listen to them anyway. Our wedding coordinator actually recommended this and it was the best idea ever! 

Post # 26
4539 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

View original reply
athenalex:  if I was your Maid/Matron of Honor, I’d kiss you. I have having to make a speech/toast. When I’m not having to give the speech, I really couldn’t care less about listening to them. So I’m all for this idea.

Post # 27
1619 posts
Bumble bee

H and I did not have any toasts given at our wedding.  No one, not even H or I, spoke at our wedding.  I don’t think anyone missed them.  

I know as a guest, I find toasts, mainly if they are long and filled with a lot of inside jokes, to be very boring.  Now if someone stood up and said “I am so happy for the both of you and wish you nothing but joy and happiness.  Congratulations!” then that is perfect.  But when you start getting into stories about when you were both 5 making mud pies in the backyard is where I start glazing over.

And it certainly is not rude to say “no toasts” to your friends and family.  Just tell your DJ that no one is allowed the microphone and if anyone asks about doing a speech/toasts just tell them thanks but no thanks.

Post # 28
473 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

I think the bigger thing will be explaining to the people who are probably expecting to give speeches (parents, best man/moh) that you don’t want them in advance. A lot of people want to give speeches to honor the couple (it’s the first thing my dad starting talking about after I got engaged) and you can’t very well have them put time at effort into it and then have them show up to find out you don’t want to hear it. Even then they may try to surprise you anyway. 

I totally get not wanting speeches, especially in your situation. But you might have some hurt feelings among people who really want to talk so be prepated for that. 

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