No visitors after baby?! Advice!

posted 3 years ago in Babies
Post # 31
Member
1151 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Wait to see how you feel but def stick to your guns if you continue to feel the same way.  I had my baby last month and did not want any visitors in the hospital or right when we got home, even family. I had a c-section and I had this insane swelling for about 10 days postpartum.  I looked like the michelin man and did not want to see anyone at all.  Also, my nipples were so sore from breastfeeding that I was basically topless 24/7.  And even after a few weeks, visitors were exhausting. My mom and sister live across the country and I had told them to come when the baby was two weeks old, which they did.  Even that was a bit too soon, but it was nice at that point to have a bit of help and social contact.  I’d say around the fourth week is when I kinda started feeling like myself again and was eager to have people meet the baby.  That’s when I started going out more and inviting people over.  But everyone is different.  Just hold your ground with whatever you feel like at the time.  Good luck!

Post # 32
Member
868 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

dreamer1288 :  I’m 16 weeks and I have already been thinking that I definitely do NOT want heaps of people around right after baby comes. I am very introverted and I love people but too much social stuff exhausts me. It will be enough having parents around. I think people should respect your wishes – they will get to see you and baby when you are ready.

Post # 33
Member
2166 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I had a c section and let me tell you, recovery from that is a freakin’ bitch. I couldn’t sit up or sit down without help for at least a week so I took visitors as help for my husband and I. People we very courteous and would drop off food & stay only a short while before leaving. Nobody came over that was sick either, if they were they stayed away. 

The one thing that was a pain were my in laws. They were there the second we got home from the hospital. I just wanted to be in peace and quiet and didn’t get that chance but I didn’t say that at the hospital so I got an entourage at home waiting for me. 

Just speaking from my experience if you want some space initially, make that clear but parenting is really, really difficult those first few weeks and having visitors really helped my sanity and well being.

Post # 34
Member
1192 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I liked visitors but spaced accordingly.  I didn’t want several in one day or large groups.  I say just do what is comfortable for you.

Post # 35
Member
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

dreamer1288 :  you have to understand that at least your close family will really want to meet the baby.

This said, we waited 4-5 days. But also because we live away from family and my mom came to stay at our place… for 2 weeks…

That said, it depends on how your labour goes, you might need the extra help.

The best thing is to control the visits. Your husband is VERY important here. Family can come to visit but for short periods of time. Arrange for a secret signal so when you’re tired or overwhelmed or just want to be alone, your husband can politely get the visitors to leave.

Good luck!! 🙂

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