(Closed) No, you can’t come!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
389 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I feel the same way! I had a family friend that I haven’t seen in 12 years insist on coming to my intimate destination wedding when closer relatives and friends weren’t even invited. On top of that she assumed that we would be paying her way…Um no, if you are looking for a free vacation try winning one on Let’s Make A Deal and get out of my face! 

Post # 5
Member
389 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@takemyhand:  I don’t get it either! Every time someone asks when and where we are getting married and I answer them they always reply “how am I suppose to go to that?!”….You’re NOT!!! I hate feeling like a witch but some people really get ahead of themselves! 

Post # 7
Member
1414 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Haha… I have to laugh…I can’t believe how rude people can be!

Post # 8
Member
3452 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

People at work keep making references to being invited.  We are just have a small wedding with family.  We can’t afford to get into inviting everyone just to be fair.  Honestly, I wish my Fiance wanted to elope.

Post # 9
Member
2725 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I posted this on another thread but it’s relevant!

Post # 10
Member
1471 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I had a family member aske me the same thing, I havent talked to him in years, he is a distant cousin and I am not very fond of him at all.  When he asked me when and where the wedding was I knew he was lookking for an invite, so i just said ” Oh its at the end of april and a cute historic B&B” and left it at that.  Did not want to give too much detail. 

He ended up telling my mom he wanted to be invited along with his family and she just said that me and my the Fiance were planning a very small wedding and that we were incharge of the guest list…. I havent heard from him since!  oh darn 🙂

Post # 12
Member
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

My mom is fishing hard for an invite for her sister, my least favorite aunt, who I think I last saw in 1992 or something. Ummmm no. This is one time where I’m glad that my mr and I are paying for it all!

Post # 13
Member
328 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

ughhhh that is so rude!!! I am dealing w/ the same problem! I feel like I am only inviting some people because I dont want to hurt their feelings, but geez i cant afford to pay for people just because! ugh!!!!

Post # 14
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Wow! I can’t believe someone would invite themselves to a wedding!!! That thought has never crossed my mind! I’ve had a couple people ask me if they were going to be invited, which was a little awkward becuase I wasn’t planning on it, but thats as bad as it’s gotten for me….. so far anyway!

Post # 15
Member
389 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@takemyhand:  LMFAO @ “tell them to swim” hahaha I’m so going to use that!

I’ve gotten a ton of “self invites” from people who assume we are paying their way. I’ve gotten a few self appointed MOHs and vocalist when A) I don’t want any maids at all and B) I’m paying musicians and “miss can I sing at your wedding?” can’t even sing! She was recently humiliated when trying out for The Voice.

People never stop being rude about weddings. They think they have just as much of a right to an opinion as the bride and groom. 

Post # 16
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

This happened to me… but in person. Luckily my wedding is far enough out that I shrugged it off. I can think of a few other people off the top of my head that will approach me with the same question. People just don’t understand wedding ettiquette.It’s almost like at our age most people are too self absorbed.

Its funny because some of my mom’s closest friends are doing the opposite and saying ‘you don’t have to invite me, i know the guest list can be a difficult thing.’ (For clarification, these people are people I’ve known my entire life and maybe have had a small hand in taking care of be since birth – they’re more like family.)

Rude never looks good on anyone. Shrug it off… afterall, think about what she’ll think when it’s her turn to deal with this problem.

 

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