(Closed) No! You will not be invited! Rant

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1158 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

How funny..hopefully he was joking.Usually people complain about the lack of people excited about their destination wedding.

Post # 4
45 posts
  • Wedding: May 2014

How are they going to know where in the world it is if they haven’t got an invitation? Laughing

You could always just tell people that you’re planning a small, intimate Destination Wedding and specify that it’ll just be close friends and immediate family. 

Post # 5
1868 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Lol.. ahhh gotta love people. I’m dreading the guest list part the most when I think of wedding planning. Yikes!

Post # 6
4893 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I’m having a Destination Wedding too and dreading that stuff. Good luck! 

Post # 7
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Since it’s in 2014, I’d just chuckle at them. If they ask for details, you don’t have any yet. By the time you get ready to invite your 30, most of the people will have forgotten about it or might not be in your life anymore. Just don’t talk to everyone about the wedding. Only talk to those involved. After wedding, tell the world. 

Post # 8
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

My friend (in canada also…having wedding in hawaii this january) had the same problem. be VERY careful with invitations, in fact, I’d use an online RSVP thing so that people can’t add lines to RSVP cards and invite their relatives or kids etc.

Her venue only allowed 40 people or else the prices goes through the roof for every extra guest, and people did the line adding to her invites so now she has 55

Post # 9
1114 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Euch, it drives me nuts when people do this!  We had Mr CL’s mum’s aunt get really cross with us because we’re not inviting her.  I’d never met her, Mr CL hadn’t seen her since he was about 7, we’re paying for our own wedding and we don’t want people there who we don’t know!  Luckily Mr CL’s mum stepped in and told her in no uncertain terms that we won’t be inviting her.  She then proceeded to spend half an hour telling me that when her daughter got married they did everything themselves so they could afford to invite more people and how they were all washing dishes at 4am.  Piss off!  There’s a good reason I’m having a venue do all this for me!

Just ignore them.  Like PP have said, I expect by the time you’re sending out invitations they’ll have forgotten about it.  And if not, just say that you’re only having 30 guests.  If they think they should have made the cut, they’re clearly deluded.

Post # 10
261 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

LOL oh people…. they crack me up.  If you makes you feel better, I just found out that my guest list needs to add 30 more people from SO’s side (totally unplanned for). 😛 Wish me luck in figuring out who to cut!

Post # 11
8438 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Eh I don’t get why this upsets people. Sure its horrible when people assume they are invited but most people are ok with the small intimate wedding reply. You could just look at it in a positive way instead- so many people care about you and would love to be included on your wedding day- I don’t see how that is a bad thing!

Post # 12
506 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Rant it out. We’ve got someone who knows Fi can’t stand them and I barely tolerate aggressively trying to include themselves onto wedding projects under the assumption that since we’re mutual friends with my bridal party OFCOURSE she’ll be invited. uh…no? Along with some non-close college pals who clearly just want a free party/reunion.

 I do agree it’s awesome people are excited, don’t worry you won’t have serious invite crashers until it gets much closer to the date. : )

Post # 13
3303 posts
Sugar bee

@honeybee1999:  +1- so agree. They are saying things now- but a year from now, they may very well forget or don’t have the money to come. Don’t worry about it for now.

Post # 14
13012 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Calm down.  I’m sure he’s joking.  Honestly, if you don’t want to invite the person, be vague and say, “the wedding will be sometime next year, not exactly sure!” and leave it at that.  If you start going off about how great and warm and fabulous your Destination Wedding is going to be, of course people will joke about wanting to come.

Post # 15
1399 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Sooo many people have invited themselves to our wedding. HATE IT! I totally feel you on this.

Post # 16
1314 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Honestly, I had a Destination Wedding and I felt the way many of you felt…it is a year away, they ain’t coming! Ha, and then the alarm clock rang, and I woke up to 78 (yes 78) wedding guest at my Destination Wedding. I planned for 40. So, while it was beautiful, and I was perfetly happy to pay for everyone who wanted to come, it did knock my plans out of wack. My centerpieces, escort cards, place cards, menus, etc, all had to redone for basically double. Part of it was my fault. I gave out what I thought were “courteousy invitations.” Never expected most of them to come. So I would be very careful about who I gave invitations to, and don’t give out details. Be very vague. Bottom line in, you can’t keep them out of the country, but you can keep them out of your wedding! Lastly, I want to say that my wedding day was the best day of my life, and soooo much fun, but not at all what I expected. I hope yours turns out to be the wedding of your dreams also.

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